This is such a beautiful poem, well done! Good use of the prompts too.
I love your choice of words, especially in the last stanza with the contrast between the 'blanket of mist' and the 'dark cloud of pollution'. Kaira is a lovely name, too! You have a vivid imagination and I really enjoyed this bittersweet poem. You really created an atmosphere of loss and sorrow, but it also wasn't too oppressive or heavy.
I think if you were looking to work on this poem, the last two lines in the third stanza could flow a little better, but that would really be nit-picking.
What an interesting piece, I have not encountered much poetry on the topic of feminism but am pleased to have stumbled across yours. I certainly admire the ethic behind your poem and the expression of it with such varied vocabulary. I like the metaphors you use of shells and auction rooms; these are very expressive and I wonder whether they could be expanded on further or followed up throughout the poem? There is a good rhyme scheme used throughout and on the whole a good flow. If you are looking to work on this poem, I would think of looking at the lines "what the outside reflects, what the outside sells" - I like the point made and would keep the second line, but I think the repetition may be unnecessary here. I definitely admire your ability to keep this short and sweet when it would be so easy to vent on the topic of injustice and attitudes to women! I think these verses do a very good job of expressing your thoughts and give the reader much to think about when it comes to value, image and the way we treat others.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 5:40pm on Nov 10, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "