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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mismake
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7 Public Reviews Given
34 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Misty Morning...  Open in new Window.
Review by EmilyC Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is such a beautiful poem, well done! Good use of the prompts too.

I love your choice of words, especially in the last stanza with the contrast between the 'blanket of mist' and the 'dark cloud of pollution'. Kaira is a lovely name, too! You have a vivid imagination and I really enjoyed this bittersweet poem. You really created an atmosphere of loss and sorrow, but it also wasn't too oppressive or heavy.

I think if you were looking to work on this poem, the last two lines in the third stanza could flow a little better, but that would really be nit-picking.

Write on!


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Review of Red  Open in new Window.
Review by EmilyC Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Dear writer,

What an interesting piece, I have not encountered much poetry on the topic of feminism but am pleased to have stumbled across yours. I certainly admire the ethic behind your poem and the expression of it with such varied vocabulary. I like the metaphors you use of shells and auction rooms; these are very expressive and I wonder whether they could be expanded on further or followed up throughout the poem? There is a good rhyme scheme used throughout and on the whole a good flow. If you are looking to work on this poem, I would think of looking at the lines "what the outside reflects, what the outside sells" - I like the point made and would keep the second line, but I think the repetition may be unnecessary here. I definitely admire your ability to keep this short and sweet when it would be so easy to vent on the topic of injustice and attitudes to women! I think these verses do a very good job of expressing your thoughts and give the reader much to think about when it comes to value, image and the way we treat others.

Write on!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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