I'm not knowledgeable of the different types of poetry so I don't even know what a monotetra is. What I do know is, this is a well written piece of poetry of any type. It has great flow, rhythm and descriptive words which give it life. It has a nice warm feel to it and a positive vibe. I too have always preferred the night over day. Darkness is simply better and hides a lot of flaws that the sunlight will ultimately reveal. I like the part of drawing strength from dark's embrace. It's nice to know that others share my view of the power of night's cloak. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
That was quite an undertaking. You did very well with this. I don't think I could have named that many movies. Your piece had smooth flow and good structure. Your word usage was very creative as you utilized the movie titles. They fit perfectly. It was comical and had me chuckling throughout. This was a fun read and looked like a fun write as well. Being well versed in the world of movies certainly gave this piece added quality. Thankfully this piece was not For Your Eyes Only. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This was very good. Your piece was filled with a lot of loving emotion and had a serious tone to it. Your words were reflective of the thoughts one has for someone they love and miss. Too often our loved ones are taken from us before we have the chance to tell them exactly how we feel. I am reminded of my grandfather and how much he meant to me. I still carry his military dog tags on my key ring to this day as a constant reminder of the man that helped shape who I am. My love for him is eternal and I yearn for the day to see him again. Nicely done! Your piece was touching. Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This piece drips with sorrow and remorse. I could feel how bad the guilty person felt after taking an innocent child's life . Your words were powerful and strong, giving this piece a strong base which allowed it to stand tall.
People do the strangest things, especially when coaxed by those that possess little or no regard for the consequences that may result from the foolish acts they conjure up. A child losing their life to such an act only magnifies its level of absurdity. The feelings of being alone and forsaken are appropriate. They wish it was all just a nightmare and wanted to wake up but at least they could wake up, unlike the young girl who now forever sleeps. Great job! Keep up the nice work and positive direction. Write on!
This piece is perfect in its simplicity. There is nothing overly complicated about it yet there is a feeling of quality emanating from it. It was a fun read and proved that you don't have to be a large mass of words to be full of literary substance. Midnight has always been looked at as a time of mystical power. A time that is neither morning or night. For a split second the two phases of the day come together and unite as one supreme force. Many unexplained phenomena have taken place at the stroke of the witching hour. This age old notion will continue its mysterious journey down the path of time. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This was great! You really touched on a subject I'm sure most have experienced, that WDC can be addicting. I have found myself on here for hours at a time reading things I never thought I would such as poetry. I was never big into poetry but now have written two of my own. I joined up with a couple of groups and as you can tell by receiving this review, have added yet another to my list. Now I find myself doing several reviews a day. I have been sucked in!
I love your descriptive word styling. It makes for a more enjoyable read. Your piece flows well and has great structure. The part about saving ourselves before we get swallowed up by WDC was comical. Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This piece has a positive, thoughtful vibe. It is filled with warm emotion and the reader can easily sense the love that is woven throughout. Your wording is very descriptive and fits the story just right. It allowed me to easily form mental pictures of each bottle art that was made, making the read more interesting. The piece flows very well and has good overall structure. You show that there are times when giving something that was crafted with love instead of on a production line proves to be the better option. Gifts from the heart have a lot more meaning. You did a fine job reminding us of that.
Your piece also shows that people with a mental illness can often find a bit of sanity when they immerse themselves in an activity they enjoy. It helps take their mind off of whatever problem they may have and simply focus on being who they are. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
Your piece makes a statement on the current sad state of humanity. If there is more of it out there, it is certainly well hidden. Your piece has adequate flow and good overall structure. The tone is serious and the emotion is a bit negative, which works here. Your wording fits each scene well. There were only a few minor issues that I will point out. The first instance comes in the second paragraph at the part ...."the love for you’re fellow man." The word "you're should be "your".
The next, in the same paragraph, is the part "He had many a friend in the army that was a different race, religion, backgrounds.". I think it would be better worded this way..."He had many a friend in the army that was of a different race, religion, or background." This is just my opinion, please take it as such.
In the third paragraph I think there needs to be a comma after"Smiling" and the last word should be "proof" instead of prove.
These are all minor and do not detract much from the overall quality of the piece. I agree that humanity is definitely not like it used to be but if other children are like the little girl there may be hope after all. Nicely done! Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
It would not have been my first much less last experience. This piece had a nice steady flow and good overall structure. It even made me reach for a dictionary because I had no clue what assuage meant. I guess you do learn something everyday. Your wording fit the story well and allowed me to feel the less than positive outlook on skiing. I found it a bit comical trying to visualize how the wife looked all tangled up in the snow. It must have been quite a sight. I prefer being an armchair quarterback to skiing down a mountain. At least then my only concern of injury would be getting a blister working the remote for hours. I definitely prefer the ending of being in the hotel safe and sound with no skis in sight. Just pass the cocktail!
Nicely done! Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
Your piece first makes a point that distinguishing right from wrong is easy. Then you state that the line is {i]often blurred which would indicate a high frequency of times when it is not easy. This is a bit contradicting. A better way to state it would be that it is easy to notice the difference most of the time and difficult some of the time. Just my opinion, please take it as such. You're heading in the right direction but just a bit off the path.
Your ending is solid and is the best part of the piece. Would feeling sorry be enough to make a difference? What about carrying the guilt of being wrong? Those two questions may never be properly answered. Overall it is a good effort. It needs a bit of tweaking but I'm sure you are capable. Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
This was very good. It has a nice, steady rhythm and is filled with warm emotion until the very end when just a bit of chill is injected. It reminds me of my own mother. Every breath she takes and beat of her heart is for her children. There is truly no stronger bond than that of mother and child. You shared a body at one time and became a part of each other. The feelings a parent has when they lose a child before their own passing can never be truly expressed. The pain and sorrow is at an incalculable level. I would never wish that on anyone, even my worst enemy.
This was a great read and definitely makes the reader pause and think for a moment about their own family. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and the positive direction. Write on!
That is just so wrong. I found your piece to be an interesting read. It had a steady flow and good overall structure. Your word usage fit the piece just right. I noticed a minor typo where "of" should have been "or" in the sentence " I didn't know if he was doing this to impress others at the party of just remind himself what a great purchase he made."
Metric time?? Very creative. Your description of what it would be had my brain hurting. I don't think I would like dealing with that. You had good interaction between characters. Nice touch having the girl pop in and help double team Bill. You did it seamlessly and she fit perfectly. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This was an interesting read. The beginning reads like a typical argument between siblings, one that I've had on several occasions growing up. Moving is not always the most pleasant experience for children, even if the parents are overly joyed by the whole thing. The interaction between brother and sister was classic. You did a fine job with your descriptive wording and presented your story well. I liked the way you turned the ending into a much more positive experience for Danni.
The piece has good flow and structure and you followed the prompt perfectly. I like the quote you used for the message in the box. It lets us know that the power of imagination can let us see anything we want with no limit on its size, shape or color. It looks like Danni's new room just got a whole lot more interesting. Nicely done! Keep up the great work and positive direction. Write on!
This piece was interesting. I had to read it a couple of times to let it sink in but I think you did a good job. I'm not experienced with poetry much at all, only having written two ever so my knowledge is very limited and does not allow for technical comments. What I can say is, you have presented your thoughts well using a minimal approach to your wording. The piece is a bit too spaced out for my taste but that is a very minor issue and does not detract from the quality of the piece. Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
This piece is short, simple yet effective and uplifting. You presented your thoughts well without having to use complicated language. It has a steady flow and good structure. You remind of us that even when we are faced with adversity, there is always a good chance of breaking through and embracing the light once again. Nicely done! Keep up the good work and the positive direction. Write on!
A piece filled with emotional anguish. It is written in such a way that the reader can understand the pain being felt. I think many of us at one time or another have felt like no one understands us. We hide behind false faces of happiness when we really want to show our contempt. Psychological scars never fully heal and are a constant reminder of things we wish we could forget. Your piece describes a troubled mind and the darkness that envelops it. We often think that our experience is unique and overuse the words "You don't know how I feel!" While that may be true on an individual basis, feelings, both good and bad are pretty much universal. A bad mood is a bad mood. It's the cause of the mood that may be different. We should at least listen to people that try to help during times of emotional crisis. Even if we disregard their opinions it should be comforting to know that at least they care. I have been guilty in the past of pushing people away, wanting to keep the dark clouds all to myself. In time I grew to realize that I wasn't alone in the world of inner pain. This piece reminded me of that. Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
Your piece is nicely written and filled with positive, warm emotion. It is always good to have someone to help you through the rough spots in your life. You have described the feeling of relief knowing you have a shoulder to cry on, a back on which to lean, and face to find comfort in. Those things can make facing life challenges a whole lot easier. Your wording was just right for the message you were trying to convey. My only suggestion is changing the color of your font. I found it a bit uneasy on the eyes and I probably would not be the only one to feel that. A piece such as this deserves to be brightened up with color to match its warm appeal. I would suggest orange or indigo. Grey detracts from it.This is merely a suggestion, please take it as such. Other than that you did a great job with this. Keep it up and continue the positive direction. Write on!
This piece is filled with darkness and has a very cold, serious tone to it. You have expressed your feelings very well with this. When the world you live in is filled with nothing but darkness and you feel invisible to all that surrounds you, it certainly can take a negative mental toll. Your piece flows well and allows the reader to grasp and feel the despair. I can't comment adequately on the technical aspects of your piece but I can say that it was worded well and an enjoyable read. Nicely done. Keep up the great work and the positive direction. Write on!
This piece reaffirms the fact that sticking to the truth, no matter how harsh or boring it may be, is the best way to go. Lies may seem innocent at times but ultimately they will hurt someone. Your piece has fairly good flow and word usage. The formula it follows does not tread new ground but it is not a dead end either. It has the possibilities of traveling a smooth road and really taking the reader for a nice ride. Your character seems rather calm despite just being shot at. Her mood should be a bit more anxious and excitable, something that is easily obtained with the right wording. I have confidence you can make it work. Keep up the positive direction and write on!
You get credit for attempting to put together a structured piece. However, this does need a lot of work. It is very choppy and grammatically it has a lot of issues, too many to even begin listing. I am not an English professor by any means and I have my days when my grammar is less than perfect. We have all dealt with grammar issues. That said, this piece was difficult to read. It had a rough flow to it and I found myself stopping and restarting as I read this. It would be a good idea to rework and rewrite this. You know what you want to say, you just need to refine it to allow for a smoother, more enjoyable read.
I like the idea you have of a couple wanting to be together and doing what it takes to make the relationship work. Far too often people can be torn apart by family members or friends that think the relationship will ultimately fail. Having children before marriage is a controversy that has been debated for ages. You managed to show that determination and desire can make things right. Your piece is capable of transforming from the ugly duckling into a beautiful swan. With enough desire of your own, you can make it happen. Good luck and stay positive. Write on!
This is very short but you made your points in the limited length you kept it at. It has a cold feeling of anguish and suffering. Very dark indeed. Your piece has fairly good flow to it and I also think that it begs for an addition. The mentioning of the single moment that would end it all could probably be played out with a description of the kind of act it would be that could bring everything to a screeching halt. This is just a thought, take it for what it's worth. This piece has potential to grow and improve. I believe you can make it happen. Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
I have reviewed quite a few poems lately and this is the first one that I had to read several times trying to grasp it. That may be a reflection of my extremely limited knowledge of the world of poetry or simply that It did not give me any particular feel. Since it would be unfair of me to comment on the technical aspects of your piece because I lack the proper knowledge, I can only offer my opinion.
As stated before, I did not "feel" anything after reading this. It has the appearance of a well written piece, with good word usage and a touch of complexity. You did a very good job with those aspects. However, I had a neutral reaction after reading it three different times and I can't put a finger on exactly why. Others may view it differently and more experienced poets would probably have a much higher level of appreciation because they can look at it with an educated eye. On that note I will say that the only true person that this piece has to satisfy is its author because we all must write for ourselves first before doing it for others. Keep up the positive direction and write on!
Your piece shows how special a strong and loving connection between two people can be. It is filled with warm, positive emotion. The reader gets a good sense of the feelings you experience. Love can be the single greatest feeling you could ever have. This piece feels like you captured a moment in your life when everything felt perfect. Your soul found its other half and your identity became clear. Nicely done.
There were only two very small bits that I felt needed attention. The first was the line"For you bring out the best in me." I believe you could eliminate the word "For". The second occurs here, "When I look into your eyes not only do I see my future. I see my world." I think putting a comma after "future" would be a better fit. These are just my humble opinions, please take them as such. You did a great job overall with this piece. Keep up the positive direction and write on!
I do believe this is the first story I ever read that came from the point of view of an old sweater. A different twist to say the least. Your piece was simple but a fun read. I tried to imagine a sweater having sad thoughts and wondered if it had any conversations with the other discarded clothing in the pile. "Hey what's up Mr. Sweatshirt? Looks like you've been here a while, you're getting kind of stiff!"
Your managed to convey a sweater's feelings(if they mysteriously had any ) and allowed the reader to see the emotional ride said sweater was taking. It all ended up well in the end. I just hope Paulette used color safe detergent so the sweater's good mood wouldn't "fade" away . Nicely done! Keep up the good work and positive direction. Write on!
Your piece has potential. The flow and rhythm is a bit off, sometimes making for a choppy read but your subject stays true. I'm not a big technical expert on the ins and outs of poetry so while I won't comment much in that regard I will offer my opinion. You show dark emotions and give it a serious tone, allowing the reader to see the struggle that making a tough decision can be. Sometimes when faced with a tough situation like this it is best to go with your gut feeling. More often than not it is right.
Your word usage is effective and you kept your piece short and to the point. Too often a piece can be overdone. You managed to avoid that. It only needs a bit of tweaking, maybe some slight word changes to help with the pace. Overall you did a good job with this. Keep up the positive direction and write on!
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Now I find myself doing several reviews a day. I have been sucked in! 
I guess you do learn something everyday. Your wording fit the story well and allowed me to feel the less than positive outlook on skiing. I found it a bit comical trying to visualize how the wife looked all tangled up in the snow. It must have been quite a sight. I prefer being an armchair quarterback to skiing down a mountain. At least then my only concern of injury would be getting a blister working the remote for hours. I definitely prefer the ending of being in the hotel safe and sound with no skis in sight. Just pass the cocktail! 