Wow.... That is awesome! I can't beleave how long it was. It took a while to read, but it was worth it! You used descriptive words very well and I hope you write more like this. Are you a writer (for a living)? Because it seems like it. Well, Congradulations for a great story!
So far, this story is good. Please add more though! I think it has very good/well descriptioning and a good option to fatten up different people. I found the options pretty good, but you should add more. That is the only fault of this story. There isn't enough...
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