CJ Johnson--I HAD TA READ THIS because I, too, am C J Johnson (Jr)--So....you wanted ta create something scary yet fun--Well...congratulations....this is a scary yet fun read--I enjoyed it--It is very good prose--Breaking glass cascades like rain....I like that as it brings very vivid and real pictures and sounds to this reader's brain--Yes....this is scary but not horrifiying with blood all over the place as that would be messy, too--I HATE MESSY--I enjoyed this--You use simple language put together in an orderly way to bring the reader a decent amount of fright--The torment ending represnts death to me--VERY GOOD JOB--Cliff (Johnson), Jr.
I like this--It has the feeling of an abstract painting that gives you the picture, but it snot very clear and is opened to interpretation--I like the way that the lines flow along easaily and I LOVE THE RHYMES--If you wanna be ay poet show me someything poetic.....and you did, too--I LOVE IT!!!--He was an old man;how could they ever suspect you?:LOL....the suspect?--Mr. Stethoscope ....the doctor....the crocodile in lip-stick started to cry....the golddigger....; Mr. Magnifying-glass ....Sherlock (the cops)....What a good story told in codes--I like this poem--GOOD JOB--Cliff
Really like your first part here: I want something or someone new....LOL--Many people, I have found, want EVERYTHING, too--We do not need everything!!!--At least I don't--I need ta be happy and IF I AM HAPPY, then I have all I need....because....what more is there?--Then the new gets old and what have you then? but a need for new, again--And not everything new will bring the same happiness, either--Once true happiness is found, we should learn how to hang onto it with all our might!!!...because happiness is a special thing--But the grass is always greener....LOL--Then again, we should experience several things so we could tell happiness from boring to unhappiness--For example....I have thirty-some premium movie channels on my cable movie pack which affords me on demand viewing of any movie shown on my movie channels any time I want to watch it--When I find a movie I like, it is nothing for me ta watch it everytime there is nutin of any interest to me on--Some may say, How can you watch the same movie over and over?--I used ta go to Rocky Horror Picture Show and listen to the audiance scream out the lines before the actors....because they saw it enuff times ta know the lines as the movie made them happy so they would see it over and over!!!--People like that are grounded and smart as they know what makes them happy--People should find a comfortable rut and battle against anyone who tries to alter their happiness...in my opinion--I liked your writing here as it got me thinking....can you tell???--LOL--GOOD JOB--Cliff
BRAVO--I would LOVE FER YOU TO EXPLAIN THIS TO ME!!!--LOL--Before I forget..."Two swallows flew in playful circles chasing each other, and then flitted away at a soaring tangent"....each other is used when there is more than two....more of a group--In this instance when you sare talking about only two, the proper wording or phrase would be "one another"....rather than each other--LOL--A VERY SMALL, almost insignificant correction--I enjoyed the mystery of the beginning of this story and I cursed you because I had that damned song, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz in my head for so long....for too long!!!--LOL--I do not dislike the tune, but at the same time, it is not like I enjoy it either--A case of a irrellevant song trapped in your head--Anyway, I really enjoyed the surrealism of the first part of this story....kind of like a fairy tale--My own book, "GODDA's Truth" I marketted as an adult fairy tale--LOLI was eager to find out how it all tied together and what happened in the end.....but then you cut to this outing--And I'm thinking....how did we get here from there?....You cvannot get here from there!!!--Unless this is thge activity in the ewriter's head as he travels thru this trip--All of the characters in the fairy tale part of thhe story ewere characters from his previos books so maybe his mind was racing over the books he has written to the books that are still cooking in his creative mind--I DON'T KNOW....but that is my take on it--It is a very long read, but the read takes NO MAJOR EFFORT--And I was pleased that the ending included two movies that I have seen and enjoyed--Not so much The Truman Show, but the game was one of my favorites for a long time--Another reason I enjoyed your writing is that the punctuation was good as I HATE when anything is punctuated so poorly that it takes away the reader's mind from what they are reading--I enjoyed the read and it was a pretty good story--Your descriptions were good and your writing was (is) easy to follow--GOOD WRITING--Cliff
LOL--This is OUTSTANDING and very amusing!!!!--It is fun ta read because it flows along smoothly and any reader must enjoy da rhymes!!!--I saw your title and brief explanation of your poem and I seriously doubted that you could convince me about your subject--BUT YOU DID IT!!!--The poem, for poertry's sake, is very well written (in my opinion) and the subject had my mind completely winding down like the mind of your dying robot--EXCELLENT WRITING.....very smartly done--Cliff
Viv--LOL--I appreciate your article here--I have always known the difference between prose and poetry...but I do take it one step farther----Whenever I read any poem I need ta see poetic talent and the easiest poetic talent (fer me) ta see is smooth flowing lines with rhymes at the end of the lines--To me....that takes a special writing talent to accomplish--Every poet is a writer, but not every writer is a poet--It is the easiest thing in the world to make any writing look like a poem--And if one calls it a poem, that's it....It's a poem because there are NO RULES that says it ISN'T A POEM--LOL--Therefore the only thing that constitutes a poem is you call it a poem....who can argue by siting any rules--But I know what I like and I know what I call poetic talent--If the lines do not rhyme, at least they should flow smoothly!!!--Show me SOMETHING OVERTLY POETIC!!!--LOL--I enjoyed reading this--I still do have my own standards for poetry--LOL--Good job researching--I enjoyed this--
In my early days of writing poetry, some critiquer told me that NO ONE would ever take my writing (poetry) seriously if I continued to rhyme--I STILL LAFFG AT THAT REMARK EVERYDAY!!!....I figure no one took that writer seriously whether she rhymed or not--LOL--And the silent war between the rhyming poets and the non-rhymers continues--LOL--I write ta make me happy--If everybody writes fer that reason, we would ALL be happy--GOOD JOB....I really enjoyed--Cliff
janice48--I'm smiling now!!!--This was GREAT FUN ta read--The lines flow well and smoothly and I LOVE THE RHYMES!!!!--It does my own heart so good ta see a mother showing her happiness and pride in her siblings.....sons, in your case--This is a celebration in the fruits of your womb--I like your poetic stylings here and you are a very good writer--You expressed your pride and joy very welll here and I enjoyed your writing to the MAX!!!--GOOD WRITING!!!--Cliff (Johnson(poo)), Jr.
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