DonnaB~On a Roll!'s (isadoranemits) Reviews

DonnaB~On a Roll!

Review Requests: OFF

17 Public Reviews Given

17 Total Reviews Given

1

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14 days may be credited.

#4047396

Review of On My Own

Review by DonnaB~On a Roll!

Rated: E

| (4.0)

Greetings! I found your poem on Shadows and Light Poetry Contest and enjoyed reading it. Here are my thoughts, I hope you find them helpful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
Readers get the immediate sense of longing and regret, which deepens when in the 3rd stanza we learn it was the speaker that walked away from the friendship they long for. Strong emotional impact, there's no ambiguity about what the speaker feels and why, but there is depth and nuance as you realize it's not only loss, loneliness, and regret, but an awareness that it's the speaker's own poor choice that caused their pain.

Form and Format:
Although it's a free form poem, it's neatly organized in short stanzas which makes it visually appealing.

Voice and Imagery:
The voice is a direct and familiar, as if you're listening to a friend tell a story; very relatable.

Nuts and Bolts:
I didn't notice any errors in this poem.

Suggestions:
No suggestions, it's an enjoyable read

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

2

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14 days may be credited.

#3720116

Review of Road Trip

Review by DonnaB~On a Roll!

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

I really like it. I don't see anything that really needs work.

3

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14 days may be credited.

#3719633

Review of PAGAN'S WORSHIP

Review by DonnaB~On a Roll!

Rated: E

| (4.0)

I'm not sure if the caps-lock is intentional, but I'm going to assume it is part of the poems presentation. For me it's a bit distracting, so if the caps-lock isn't an intentional part of the poem's structure you may want to consider changing it.

I really like the feel of this poem, overall it's well composed. I read through it a couple of times, and the suggestion I would make to polish it up would be to work on the first stanza, it doesn't have the same rhythm as the rest of the poem. I would say the poem could probably work without the first stanza all together, except I really like the first line and how it leads into the rest of the poem.

A beautiful prayer and a beautiful poem, thank you for sharing it.

4

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3719411

Review of Pagan Community

Review by DonnaB~On a Roll!

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Wonderful song, I wish I could hear it sung!

5

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3719405

Review of The Dedication

Review by DonnaB~On a Roll!

Rated: 18+

| (3.5)

I like the story you're telling in this poem, your speaker clearly has a harrowing tale to relate to the reader. I think it could be improved by finding a rhythm that allows the poem to flow more freely; that should help your reader experience these deep emotions rather than be told about them. Overall, a very dramatic scene and a beautiful poem.