I really like this peom I myself am a peom freak. I'm like half in love with peoms! And I like this peom. But on another note that picture you have I could draw that! If you want me to e-mail me about it!
I really like this short story. I would really like to read more on to this. I really like where you are coming from on this, lonely girl jus lost her parents and doesn't know what to do next, the uncle she barely knows because of the system and a old family fight!! I love the last line it leaves you hanging i just the right way to where you HAVE to read on. I have only one sugestion...................
You used this line "you that didn't deserve that" twice maybe you could use "you didn't need that" or "that wasn't right of me "
My Favorite Line
"I don't say things I don't mean, Cass. I'll never lie to you."
I really hope you can continue on to this.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ilovebradley
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 4:30am on Nov 08, 2024 via server WEBX2.