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Review of Voice of Reason  Open in new Window.
Review by HappySnapper Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Thank you for sharing this very personal poem.

I enjoyed reading it and very much like some of your imagery, for example:

In a world filled with light
I am the only shadow.

and:

Diving into this sea of shadows,
Down to the souls with no tomorrow.

I do have a few things though, that I hope you will view as constructive criticisms.

Firstly, "push's" is a typo. It should be "pushes" but I wonder whether the word pull would be more suitable in the context you use it? Also, you successfully use a consistent rhyme and partial rhyme scheme throughout the poem that works very well, so it is quite glaring in the 3rd verse
where lines 2 and 4 deviate from this pattern. As I've already noted though, the imagery in that verse is great so I'm not sure you should change it; it's just an observation about the form the poem. Finally, I have studied creative writing in University and we were always taught to avoid cliches in poetry.
'Reaching for the sun' is a much used phrase and I wonder whether you could come up with a more unusual way of expressing this image.

Other than that, no major criticisms. It reads/flows well and paints a very vivid picture of your dark state of mind at the time.

Good stuff!

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