Gobo Fongo's (gobofongo) Reviews

Gobo Fongo

Review Requests: OFF

20 Public Reviews Given

20 Total Reviews Given

1

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3451698

Review of HOW MOSES GOT THE TEN COMMANDMENTS

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

that was brilliant. I hope that that's original, and if so you sir are a truly great poet. I very much hope that you win the 5 star competition, you've earned it. I love it and especially the way that you managed to incorporate a mix of different language and slang. This is the first thing I've read on this site that has earned 6 stars, but 5 will have to do.

2

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420567

Review of Shadows In The Mist (Now With Audio)

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Very good work. The structure and wording all lend to a solemnity that's impressive. The reader can really feel that you mean it.

The only line that for me doesn't flow with the rhythm of the piece is "He bravely made his choice"

It's a good line, it just doesn't quite match up with the rest. As long as you're singing it though I don't think it makes any difference.

Nice work.

3

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420561

Review of Don't Hold Back

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (3.5)

Well done. I think the whole thing flows nicely except for two lines:

Your keep safe life reminds you

and

When your back was against the wall

There's nothing wrong with the content, just that they don't flow with the rest. But it may just be me.

Good job anyway.

4

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420423

Review of Spherical Phood Phobia

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (5.0)

I like it a lot, great idea.

The only thing I'd say interrupts the flow and distracts from the story is the bit about the smoke; it doesn't really have to do with the story, which is fine, it just goes on a bit too long for such a short piece.

5

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420420

Review of A Soldier's Life For Me

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (5.0)

That was awesome. It was wonderfully satirical, a light hearted look at the future of war and a parody of it's past. You earned a 5, I honestly don't know what you could improve.

6

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420386

Review of Jerome's Magic

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (4.5)

I like this story a lot. I like the contrast in the first and last lines and the simple honesty of it's presentation.

It's not perfect, I think it could use a bit of editing, but then everything could. I think you could improve the first two paragraphs most of all.

7

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420384

Review of The Frog...What?

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (4.0)

hah!

That took some effort I think, nice job.

8

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3420380

Review of A Wolf's Prayer

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: 13+

| (2.5)

I think it's a good job, but it just doesn't flow. Maybe it's just me.

9

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3419451

Review of 30 seconds until it was done

Review by Gobo Fongo

Rated: E

| (3.5)

I pray for the life's that are taken tragically
Every seconds of the day.

I pray for the lives that are taken tragically
Every second of the day.

I like the content, but I'm not seeing a real structure or unity throughout the poem. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I like it.