Ideally one should be a vessel in another's life of respect and support. Unfortunately sometimes we love those who lack the capacity or desire to express such. The lack of another does not define who we are. One needs to surround themselves with others who bring out the best in them. Love and respect thyself in the face of adversity.
There is a lot of pain here. Emotional and physical. Lots of underlying deep seated feelings associated with the physical condition. I can't help thinking that you would really benefit from some past life memory sessions from a qualified practitioner to get to the root of this affliction. It could really be life changing for you.
A good book to read to understand what I have suggested is: Other Lives, Other Selves --- A Jungian Psychotherapist Discovers Past Lives. by Roger J. Woolger, Ph.D.
I do hope you are open to this and I have not offended you in any way.
Thank you for sharing. I write for therapeutic reasons also. I find it is a great healer in and of itself.
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