This is a great piece of writing, Lolli. I can already see you have talent and you show promise. This piece was fairly easy to read and understand, and I particularly liked the idea of the man in fact being a dragon in disguise. The snow and cold set a mood of death - the great era is dead now, the great wars destroyed it.
The thing you could improve the most in this piece of writing is grammar. Your spelling and overall sentence structure is great. But the actual reading of the piece is not as smooth as I would like because it's all a bit too wordy, and in places the way the words are phrased makes me have to read it again a few times to understand.
I also noticed, in a few places, you use the same word closely together. For example "It was a particularly COLD winter and he hated it. It was too COLD." Try using another word like 'chilly' or take out the 'too' and insert 'freezing.' Using the same word close together like that causes a redundant feel that is a bit annoying.
Still, I was able to read it and understand it and I enjoyed it. Keep up the good work! I'll look for the next part of this piece.
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