Overall, I was very intrigued by the story. the writing is very engrossing and descriptive enough as to tell the story, but not force it down the readers throat. The ideas are interesting, especially the elevator, which I could see as I read that part, which also kept my interest peeked. The elevator scene was also the reason I printed the rest of the story after reading the first two chapters. the only thing that I think you might want to do is to go into further description of Jack's life. I imagine that this must be part of your plan, because there has to be a reason Jack would go to the office building in the first place. I was a little thrown off by the outer space thing, but i'm certain it will all get tied back into the story. Good Luck get your book published
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/fabianmockian
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 11:43pm on Nov 23, 2024 via server WEBX2.