Wow, this is a very dark piece but it's a great read! It's very well written, although there is one typo "plan to see" should be "plain to see" but I didn't come across anything else. One of my only criticisms with this piece is in the first half of the story when Amanda's life is being explained that there is a bit too much detail when it should perhaps be a bit more general in terms of description.
Amanda's character is very well explained; she's a modest, vulnerable girl who perhaps takes on too much in her life and won't let the fact she's wealthy make her lazy.
The twist at the end was very good and completely unexpected - techniques like that will be very useful if you're planning on turning this into a novel (which I hope you are).
It's a very good story and I hope you keep writing :)
Very romantic! The descriptions are very good. It is easy to see how he ranks himself amongst others and how he knows that she is the one for him. Lovely poem, keep writing!
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