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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/drishali
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Review of Dolls  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello!

I like the concept of your piece, it is direct and conveys the meaning well.

The simple external rhyme of lace and paste in your piece added an element which stood out, albeit in a good way. A suggestion would be to create a rhythm for your words and add some structure or make it a complete free verse, if that's your thing, since the random rhyme disrupts the flow.

Looking forward to reading more of your work :)
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