I like the characters and the world building elements, and the dialogue is quite good, but just one question bugs me. If it is a planet, and all planets have mass, how does it not possess any gravitational pull? If this is SciFi, and has no magical elements, then how would a planet have no pull? All mass has a pull on one another. I did not finish reading this, and if there is some explanation I am missing I apologize as I am in a rush, and will finish it later today, but I thought I'd mention this.
I enjoyed the psychological breakdown of the jester that is not too commonly seen. The theme surrounding happiness and mortality is prevalent in this piece, and it offers insight into the clouded lives of many suffering from depression or the unheard, such as the jester, and whether you intended to do that or did not intend to do that makes no difference.
You may want to add more punctuation for impact and charged sentences, emphasis, conclusions of thought, or to make it generally flow better.
Your meter and rhyme seem good, and it is a good poem. I like it. That's all I have to say, and I hope this helps. Adieu.
To start things off, I have to applaud your use of diverse and appropriate vocabulary and rhyme scheme. You seem to have a rhyme for everything, and your research shows. I myself have a sense of a few of the personalities behind a couple of these poets and I am happy you made it shown. Just a couple typing errors throughout the piece, but I enjoyed the poem. Excellent job.
This is a wonderful piece. Your voice is quite poetic and the connotations of the figurative language you utilize fits the scene. I enjoyed the story and the twist, and the underlying theme related to freedom, betrayal, and irony. Just a few grammatical errors and format errors, but regardless a beautiful piece.
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