Good poem, good flow. Just a few suggestions: Second stanza, second line reads: "And a loyal friend". I would suggest adding in another word to even out the syllables, this one sentence sounds too short to go with the slightly longers ones around it. Also, the very last line reads: "She knows what to do". I think you should rethink that last line, it doesn't seem like a good closing line. Perhaps you could shift the 2nd and 4th lines and maybe tweak line 2 so that it makes a good closing sentence. Just my opinion, otherwise, good job.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/clayc852
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 10:16am on Nov 23, 2024 via server WEBX1.