"Nothing can put and [an?] end to you."
"The phoenix rises over through time" Not exactly sure what this means, the line that follows doesn't really make it easier to understand. Then again, that might just be me.
That's the only part that didn't seem quite right.
Apart from that, this is an incredibly well written piece. I love the themes and where you went with them.
Love poems are always so touching and it is clearly evident through this piece that you are madly in love. I was glad that it wasnt another poorly constructed, two words a line, love poem. You chose your words wisely and made it read as beautifully as love itself.
Thanks for sharing this with us. :)
I think a lot of us can relate to this. I know that I can, sometimes it seems that no matter how brilliantly we might write it's still ignored by our peers.
I must say that I am jealous of your ability to wield your pen with such beauty, this piece is so wonderfully written that I wont forget it for some time.
Thanks for sharing it with the world. :)
This piece is so short and yet there is so much you could do with it, so many places you could take. I feel pity for the trucker who misses his/her home and family. I think that you could do more with this though, flesh it out and see where it takes you, they seem like they could be a really enigmatic character.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/breezus
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.06 seconds at 4:55pm on Nov 28, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
