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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/bpokey
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5 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of The Last Slice  Open in new Window.
Review by Moira R. Clip Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is really good! I love the imagery! It's so vivid and the whole story is so tactful. Near the middle of the story, though, you said the dog laid on the ground, but it should say the dog lay on the ground. I know it seems weird, but I wrote a story in English class and got marked down for it. Great job, though.
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Review of Depression  Open in new Window.
Review by Moira R. Clip Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a beautiful poem. I understand it, I can relate to it. It's full of grace and tact. You chose the perfect words! Great job! I know things may be hard right now, but try to keep looking up! It'll probably take time. I need to work on it too. Have an amazing day! :]
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Review of Help Us Help YOU!  Open in new Window.
Review by Moira R. Clip Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
This is a really good idea! Especially putting a link on your own website or blog, because I have a lot of friends who like to blog, so they would probably like this website as well. Also, I was thinking that it might be a good idea to put a link on some social networking sites, like facebook. Thank you for these ideas! ;]
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Review of Just a Fairytale  Open in new Window.
Review by Moira R. Clip Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a really good poem that could be song lyrics as well! I loved how the rhyming seemed to just happen, like you didn't have to search for the perfect word; you just knew it. It's really beautiful and shows great emotion. The only thing I would change is mabye where you say "tears falling down my face" perharps change it to something like a metaphor, because we already assume that they are falling down your face. You could put something like: Tears falling...like raindrops racing down my window. I don't know, but besides that, I LOVED your poem! Awesome job!! :]
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