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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/blucyote
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16 Public Reviews Given
25 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I found this piece quite interesting, a couple of times I was going to quit but kept reading on for being drawn in. I liked the way you described your thoughts. It had very little to do with fishing, but fishing has brought your mind to thinking about life. I only found a few grammar errors:
"I swear some of these things must have a purpose. They've go to." You need to rewrite the last sentence as it doesn't make sense as it is written.
"Not any further then to say that it was stupid..." Then should be than.
"The river isn't wide, not more then a stone's throw..." Again, then should be than.
Other than that, I think you did a great job on this. Keep up the good work.
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Review of Who  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Like you, I'm not much for religous works. But this, this was very good. I enjoyed your writing, your choice of words, the way it kept flowing. Keep it up. Nicely done.
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Review of Monster  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Good expressions, sounds like the relationship is very hard on you. Honest, real feelings written here. I hope you recover from your hurt. Nice job expressing yourself.
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Review of Broken Rope  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Short and sweet. I like it.
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5
Review of VERY short story!  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Clever. And only 5 words. Gets your attention. Good job.
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Review of THE ONE I MISS  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
You've touched my heart. I thought this was an amazing piece, the way you captured my attention right from the beginning. I absolutely expected a relationship with another human being, and the finishing line was superb. I loved it! Keep writing. I want more! Good job.
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Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This was very interesting. To take a phrase and actually put people to the test to see if it can be done is genious. So many phrases out there, so many that make no physical sense at all. I loved your challenge, and I'm sure your co-workers did also. Even though they thought you were a little, well, out there in left field. Great job!
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Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I'm really glad I clicked on this article of yours. I haven't written any queries to date yet, but have been considering contacting magazines for a couple of short stories of mine. Reading this has shown me at least a couple of mistakes I would've surely made. It has been very helpful. Thanks!
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Review of The Flight Risk  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I don't think this could have been written any better. The story was marvelous, your choice of words and descriptions were outstanding. No flaws, no improvements, just perfect. Sounds like it could be a made-for-tv movie of the week. Thank you for letting me take part in reading your story.
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Review of Change of Life  Open in new Window.
Review by J. Allen Trick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I liked being held in suspense until the very end. The story was short, but kept you hanging on for more information. Very well done, my dear!
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