\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/bbbaldwin
Review Requests: OFF
69 Public Reviews Given
127 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... -1- 2 ... Next
1
1
Review of True Love's Heart  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
I'm sorry but I didn't feel what you were trying to express in this short poem.

That's not to say that this poem isn't viable, its just that it's not to my personal style and taste, which varies randomly=)

Didn't want to read, add to views, and not say anything. BTW...


BBBaldwin
2
2
Review of Solitude  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
keep on writing.
3
3
Review of The Other Woman  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I would like to tell you that I'm honest in my reviews, period.

This one was alright, but not as heartfelt as I AM BLack, and you ended with a comma. That makes your writing look raggedy, and I can tell your better than that, try using (...).

Maybe this wasn't as heartfelt because your not a cheater, perhaps? :)

BBBaldwin
4
4
Review of I Am Black  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I really enjoyed your poem, and I'm glad I stumbled upon it.

It's heartfelt and heartful all in one instance.

It was you being you, I guess?

I mean the words felt truthful, you embraced your heritage, our heritage.

I hope I am speaking for many when I say you spoke what so many feel no matter what our individual shade is.

GREAT READ

BBBaldwin
5
5
Review of Draft I - Starry  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I like where your going with this but the beginning doesn't quite flow for me...

It feels jaulty in places...You had enticed me fully with those pretty words from that deliciously deceptive mouth. You had turned my existence into an universe of begging, and whimpering, and touching.

I can tell that your working on something here and would love to read more after you add and revise.

BBBaldwin

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go NoticedOpen in new Window..
6
6
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
This story is moving at a nice pace...I won't point out the grammatical, because you already know...smile.

I think and believe you'll get more views if you split this up into shorter pieces. People sometimes seem to shy away from longer pieces. Remember, most of us are only squeezing in a few moments to read someone else.

BBBaldwin
7
7
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
First let me say that you really need to give this piece a good once over...

You have a few mispelled words and grammar issues.

Now on to how I felt about this piece, I really liked it. It moves along nicely. Seems like something that you would want to devolop into either a short story or longer...

BBBaldwin


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go NoticedOpen in new Window..


8
8
Review of Shadows  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I liked this poem...

I think I've read something else by you but amongst the two I would have to say this one is the best. I love the way after you describe the attributes of the animal, then you let the reader know it is you who wants to devour and prey on the innocence of...a little girl today
9
9
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I don't really know what to say...

I mean I get the meaning in the message, that part I get...trust me I get it, but for some reason I just don't feel the passion that I think your trying to express in this piece. I think if you weren't concerned about rhyming, this poem would come off as a much more passionate piece. That doesn't mean I don't think that it's good work, it just didn't move me the way I think you intended it to.

BBBaldwin
10
10
Review of The Silent Reply  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I really liked this poem...

The way you jumped between dialogue and thought was great...

I also like the way you switch the roles of care-taker and sent the message that you can and do reap what you sow

Great job

Keep up the good work

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
11
11
Review of Getting Over  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I liked this piece...

I believe all women relate to a piece like this because to some degree we've all experienced some form of abuse...

That fact that you've found and understand we're true comfort comes from is the part that pulled me in so that I could share in your good news...

Great Job

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
12
12
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was a great read...

I'm from Pennsylvania and didn't know that Mr. Rodgers was from here...


This piece brings back fond memories for me because I ALSO was a frequent viewer of sometimes repeated episodes, seeing as I'm the eldest of six siblings...

Great memorial...

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
13
13
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
This was o.k. for me, but it read more like an extended poem, than a short story...

The concept is good though everyone can relate to would/could/should have done...

The end threw me a bit, I could relate to everything until you made the man have a nervous breakdown...

I would have liked to read a different ending...

Oh well, maybe next time, in the mean time this is a shameless plug...So Laugh Out Loud...*Smile*
 Issues...Living within Sanity chapter 1 Open in new Window. (18+)
It's about issues not just Issue...aka ISSUES....written w/thought
#919735 by Published 6/22/13--GrownStuff Author IconMail Icon


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
14
14
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
I'm really feeling this story, I haven't checked for punctuation or any other trivial thing...

I just got caught up in the story...

Which is intrigueing...

I've read two parts and will be reading more...

I didn't check to see if this was a finished story but will probably read to its end...*Bigsmile*

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
15
15
Review of Changed  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
this piece needs self/editing/review....

I ran into a lot of missing punctuation.....

missing words..........

run ons..........

maybe space the sentences.......

it will convey your message with much more clarity.....

the story in general is o.k.

I'LL CONSIDER GIVING IT ANOTHER LOOK AFTER SOME EDITING.............




BBBALDWIN
16
16
Review of Pledge of Love  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

This piece is nice.........Period.


Love is so simple, yet it turns the earth,
Questions people have, to us no worth,
Even in the dark, these times, my eyes behold,
Our endless love shimmers, like flowers made of gold,
Fleeting moments of pain, anxiety and fear,
Like a quick morning's rain, they come with a tear.
But soothing the rain is, to the world's pleasure
You will be showered with love, too much to measure
My devotion, my love, heart and soul, will not waver
As a first breath of life, a wine, you will savor
My will not quake, nor my desire falter
Our union will last, continuing from the altar
Behold my love, with understanding and wonder
My pledge to you, your love, and your lover.
17
17
Rated: E | (3.0)
this piece is a little confusing........
self /editing /review may help clear up your thoughts


suggestions follow........

I have taken a few lines and edited.........

Not to many.....I have my own work to do.......lol


It was brisk and clear the day I met my new mother when I was nine years old. The wind carried the smell of fresh roasted peanuts from one of those old-fashioned vendors, and wafted past us, leaving gentle ripples on the lake.

It was brisk and clear on the day I met my new mother. I was nine years old.

From one of those old-fashioned vendors the wind carried the smell of fresh roasted peanuts, the slow breeze also left gentle ripples on the lake.




18
18
Rated: ASR | (3.5)






I am Not a poetry person by No stretch of the imagination............but,

I know good thought processes.......when I see them...

smile wide......

this is some good work..........

I haven't taken the liberty to highlight a few versus
for the purpose of suggestions....more powerful impact






Not all Christmases are bad,
Just the ones where we recall.
Memories that seems so sad,
And ones that matter at all......

Not all Christmas's are bad,
Only some where we can recall,
Memories that seem so bad/sad
things that matter not to all.


We have a stocking for you,
that still hangs by the tree.
If only you could ever know,
The effect you had on me.



I may still always wonder,
Who you would have grown to be.
Your presents never under,
The family Christmas tree...........

I may still always wonder,
Who you would have grown to be.
Your presence missed around
the family Christmas tree.



I’ll make it through this Christmas,
And live on to next year.
Where still it’s you I will miss,
With each passing, falling tear.........

I’ll make it through this Christmas,
And even on into next year.
Where still it’s you I will miss,
each year another falling tear.



bbbaldwin real reviews on a regular..........

that's what I'm looking for...........

{bitem:919735]


THIS HAS BEEN A PLUG FROM BBBALDWIN
19
19
Review of I'm Kate  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
I'M NOT INTO COPY EDITING........BUT IF I WAS I WOULD HAVE.............I'VE FOUND MULTIPLE ERRORS.........THIS SOMETIMES DISTRACTS ME FROM THE HEART OF A STORY, ALSO THIS STORY NEEDS MORE PASSION.......I GET WHAT YOUR SAYING BUT I DONT FEEL IT.........LOL..........FEEL ME........I HOPE YOU ACCEPT THIS "REAL REVIEW" IN STRIDE......LAUGH OUT LOUD I'M GIVING YOU THE CHANCE TO SHARE YOUR CHOICE WORDS WITH ME BY THIS SHAMELESS PLUG BY
 Issues...Living within Sanity chapter 1 Open in new Window. (18+)
It's about issues not just Issue...aka ISSUES....written w/thought
#919735 by Published 6/22/13--GrownStuff Author IconMail Icon
20
20
Review of Sleepwalker  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
i loved this........often, i found myself offended when i watched people pledge allegiance...........I always taught my children that "we" being our family are not in allegiance with a mere piece of cloth.........Our allegiance is with the ONE who dwells within the residents of HIS Own hand's making........keep up the good work..........this is another shameless plug by
 Issues...Living within Sanity chapter 1 Open in new Window. (18+)
It's about issues not just Issue...aka ISSUES....written w/thought
#919735 by Published 6/22/13--GrownStuff Author IconMail Icon


LOL
21
21
Review of Headphones  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
o.k. o.k. better........this I can work with. Give HER a name and although I think I know who HIM is, all readers might not.........some might be like "duhHHHHHHH" Also this would fit in the middle of a chapter in the beginning of a novel..........great.
22
22
Review of Life in a Dream  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I think i read the second part to this first..............is there a second part.........if so they read together well...........
23
23
Review of The Scoundrel  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I liked this it was cute and to the point. that's how i like poetry to the point
24
24
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I think my book is this sh*#%znit, only problem is only family have read it. I need more than courteous slaps on the back. Can anybody feel me???????????............I'll review in return.
 Issues...Living within Sanity chapter 1 Open in new Window. (18+)
It's about issues not just Issue...aka ISSUES....written w/thought
#919735 by Published 6/22/13--GrownStuff Author IconMail Icon
25
25
Review of Life in a Dream 2  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I like it as a whole but I recommend alot of editing and less usage of the word AND. You'll see when you take it out it flows better i. e. I curl into a ball, tears threatening to spill, questions running through my mind.
27 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 2 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/bbbaldwin