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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/agfawcett
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8 Public Reviews Given
8 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Live or Don't  Open in new Window.
Review by Gwyn Max Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I really like this poem! And the layout and word usage is very creative and clever. I loved the way you had a subtle rhythm to the words and also the interesting messages you communicated. My favorite part of this was:

live: so weary
don't: too weary
live: eyes teary
don't: eyes teary

and


live: false hope
don't: false hope
live: find real hope...

I thought that these lines (among all the others too) really had some interesting messages behind them. You have some real talent with poetry. Keep up the good work :) and write on!
-Gwyn
2
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Review of There Was A Time  Open in new Window.
Review by Gwyn Max Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I absolutely love this! You have perfectly captured such a painful experience that I have written about myself, and you have done a great job of making the emotions feel very real. I love the use of rhyme that you used and how it wasn't too distracting but it added a very Spoken Word like feel to it. you obviously have a real talent for poetry, so keep up the good work and write on!
-Gwyn
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Review of The Escape  Open in new Window.
Review by Gwyn Max Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I like this quite a bit! Your usage of adjectives is intriguing. Also, I like the way you talk about light. Your writing style is very descriptive. If I had one suggestion it would be to be careful with your adjectives. I have a similar style as you. I like to be very vivid and descriptive, but sometimes the adjective placement can feel kinda repetitive. For example, though I like these descriptions a lot, look for the pattern: yoking stress, burning sun, dark black home, temporary blindness, watchful eye, young soul, golden land. So, just look out for this pattern, because even though it is very beautiful at times, it can grow to be repetitive.

Other than this, your writing is very vivid and interesting. Keep up the good work!
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