Tears are streaming down my face right now as it's been throughout reading this whole story. I find this tale so touching and inspirational. It just warms my heart. And what a great idea to tell the story of Jesus from a dokey's perspective. I think this would even make a great children's story. I hope you DO win this contest. I hope you get the grand prize for it. I enjoyed reading it so much and I'll be passing it along to others.
Wow, this is a beautiful piece! I came to it on the public reviews page. It's a small poem, but to the point. It flows well and has beautiful imagery. I just love the words of it. I'll have to save this one to my favorites. The only thing I would suggest to improve it is the formatting of the piece. Maybe you can center it and that would help? Or some other formatting. Thank you for sharing your wonderful poem.
I really liked this piece and I feel it just needs to be polished up to perfection. Some of your words in your sentences are the wrong type like you have "I didn't quite no what to say." "No" should be replaced with "know." Also again you have "when I finished wringing up the order." "Wringing" should be "ringing." Just some typos for you to correct. I'll gladly change my rating to a higher one after this piece is edited. I think it's a great story and I laughed and laughed at the surprise ending. I would have done the same thing as you since I've never heard of a Bleeding Heart plant. Good luck in the contest!
Cheers,
Michelle
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/addicted2tz
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 12:50am on Dec 22, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
