Wow! I'm hooked. I loved the complexity and originality of situation here, and the language you used to describe the body "mods" and other facets of the culture was very sleek and modern.
There were just a few points that could have used some polishing - you tended to repeat the same adjectives to describe characters, particularly the lunatic/insane father. Also, for the first quarter to half of the chapter, the paragraphs were really, really short, which made the story feel a little bit choppy to me. Varying the paragraph length and adding some longer paragraphs would help smooth things out.
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