Today isnt just another day, its my birthday and as i sit and reflect on all the horrorable things that happened and the wonderful things that i have enjoyed, i see the good doesnt really out way the bad. Now the bad wasnt as much as the good but the bad was really bad. I can remember things that happened as a young child that were awful but i dont remember anything else. Teachers, friends, or even crushes dont exist in my mind beyond the bad things. Its hard turning 31 but i think back to the good things and i'm glad i survived. warm memories dont exist beyong great loves and kids. I think back to when i had my first child and how she never cried but always starred at like i was this big angel in her world. She'd touch my face to be sure i'm real. i could real her eyes like a book. when she played she always look for me to make sure i didnt go anywhere far. my second one did all that and some to her dad but she'd always look like she had something to say. my youngest had hugs to last. |