Tales from real life |
Well, if they're not true, they oughta be! |
A More Plausible Version “Okay, you won this round, but I still think I’m on the right track,” Satan grumbled. “Heaping personal misfortune on Job may not have been effective but offering power to Hitler almost worked. And I did get his ‘good Germans’ to exterminate millions of your chosen people. Next time, I’ll finish the job.” “Next time? Why must this vain struggle go on? Will you not repent and turn back to Me? Is there to be no end to the misery that you inflict on My creation?” “You’ll see, this humanity you love so much will ultimately betray you. They’re shallow, greedy, and selfish. They love power and celebrity more than they love God. In fact. I’ll bet that I can corrupt the very people who defeated Hitler. Your so-called greatest generation will beget the Antichrist who takes them down. All I need is a man of privilege who gains power without earning it. An amoral man who can lie, cheat, and steal without conscience or compassion. A preening buffoon who isn’t taken seriously until it’s too late. And then, absolute power will corrupt absolutely. He’ll set himself up as an object of worship and the name of God will be utterly forgotten!” “You know that this is pointless, that it only causes needless suffering and pain. Pain for you as well as for them. Only ask forgiveness and it shall be given to you as it is to all.” “No, I won’t do that. I know they’ll betray you again, I'm sure of it. They ate the fruit of the tree of knowledge and brought suffering on themselves. They worshipped a golden calf, why not an orange moron? And anyway, we’re playing by your rules. We all have free will, so you have to let me tempt them.” “Very well, we’ll have another round.” And so, on June 14th, 1946, God covered Satan's bet and created Donald J. Trump to be his tool. |