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 |   Theses are my thoughts and ramblings as I forge my way through this thing they call life. |
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These are my thoughts and ramblings as I forge my way through this thing they call Life. I blog with these groups:     "Blogging Circle of Friends "  [E] 
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30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 19th Write about something ordinary that brought you unexpected joy. For family birthdays, Mom mother started a tradition of giving flowers to her mother as a kind of 'thank you' for having her. I have continued with the tradition. This year my mother asked for no flowers as she said she didn't want to do the work of having to cut them off or put them in water. No problem, I thought.... so I went and bought her a plant instead. No cutting or replacing the water needed. Just some easy watering... and putting the plant up at night so the cat won't eat them. The plant I got her is tulips. They will bloom and grow and then when they are done we can plant the bulbs in the fall for them to come up next spring. I was pleased that I honoured her request, but still got her something pretty... and something we can enjoy next spring as well. |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 18th It’s Show and Tell Day here at the 30DBC! Think of an item that is special to you (it may help if you are able to see your chosen item while you write your entry). Describe it in as much detail as possible. Then, tell us its story. How did it come to be in your life and what makes it important to you? An item that is special to me.... it is a teddy bear. Soft and cuddly with hair the colour of a Chai latte. He has a sewn on little black nose and brown button eyes. I bought this little guy with my very own money. I was twelve and my mother and I were coming back from our first extended trip. A bus tour of the New England states. It had been a lovely trip. Lake Placid several years after the Winter Olympics there, Boston, Cape Cod. I tasted my first New England Clam Chowder there and have loved it ever since. I bought my bear at the duty free shop on the way home. My first big purchase. I was so pleased with my choice. That memory of feeling stays with me. That little bear has a place of honour on my bed each night even now.... and I just turned 53. He'll be 41 in the summer. Four decades. It is not the oldest thing in my room. I also have a stuffed monkey that also takes a prime spot on my bed. It is a gift from my step -Grandfather's sister-in-law.I called her Auntie Betty, but she was not a relation of mine. She got it on one of her travels. I can't recall where, but I admired it ever time I went to visit her. I would say it is at least as old as I am, if not older. One of the last times I saw her she gave it to me. That monkey, with its hard head and painted sleeping face, its stuffed hands tucked under its chin and its zipper pouch in its back (for pajamas, I think) reminds me of that dear woman. Her kindness to me. Her wonderful stories of exotic travels. We were not really related, but I loved going to see her each time I went to Timinis and I think she appreciated my goodness. I don't think she had had any children of her own, but she had been a teacher; a grade 5 teacher and I thought she was amazing. I don't think she had much family left. |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 17th Use the following words in your entry today: tumultuous, navigate, journey, and gargantuan. Well, I could be a smart ass and tell you that I need to use the words tumultuous, navigate, journey and gargantuan in my entry today and be done with it, but that would be just boring. But it would meet the requirements in one sentence.  So I will navigate my mind and see what else I can come up with. It's pretty scary in there... the dust bunnies have gargantuan sized teeth! I don't think I have ever used the word gargantuan to describe anything.... or not had to write it anyway. My journey through this week has been rather tumultuous. Thankfully, I have survived and have lived to tell my tale. I think a lot of the staff at the school I work at have had busy weeks. Only a mere handful (4) of us made it to yoga one nutrition break because the others that signed up, were in their classrooms helping students or dealing with behaviour issues that had come up during the first 90 minutes of their day... and that was only Wednesday. We were all starting to wonder if their had been a full moon we had missed or something. Thursday was even wilder. There were two Educational Assistants that took the day off today to recuperate from some behaviour issues that happened yesterday and another one is wearing a heating back bandage after getting hit in the back by a flying Ipad. I know at least one student got sent home for having destroyed his classroom. He was in the office when I saw him and he was upending things in there while the Child and Youth worker was calling his mother. He was a grade one student... from a regular class. In my class, which is a special education class, we had to remove the paint center because one of our little darlings was interesting in flinging paint all around the room. You might be wondering if we are a special school with an over abundance of students with behaviour issues, but we are not. We are just a regular little public school. Each class has their share of students with behaviour concerns. We have a great staff and everyone has a good sense of humour. Some days... or weeks you really need it. And ear plugs in the Autism classes like mine, might be a good idea too. A few teachers are planning on celebrating the end of the week at a local bar.... a chance to laugh and talk before transitioning back to their families for the weekend. Of course it also happened to be treat day in the staff room today so the extra sugary treats were also greatly appreciated. I was happy to only have a half day today although my students were awesome today! |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 16th What are you waiting for? There are so many ways to answer this question, both light and heavy, so I look forward to reading where you go with it! I like this prompt. Very open ended. I could have my characters ask this of each other. My characters are both dealing with past painful relationships that make them a little wary of getting together; of moving past the past to something much better. My main character has left an unfaithful ex boyfriend that was screwing a woman what was supposed to be her friend. She also learns their relationship has also been a way of stealing her work designs and passing them off as their own so that this so called friend can get a promotion. She left that messy business behind her in the City and headed for the safe haven of Cottage country where her family has a place. She goes to lick her wounds and figure out what to do next. Her potential new love interest is a friend of an old childhood friend. He too has suffered from love and loss. His ex girlfriend took off for the City because she was bored with living in a sleepy, summer tourist trap - as she called it. He worries that my main character wont stay and will leave at the first sign of adversity. With time, they both learn to trust again. This question is what they ask themselves when they feel the spark of attraction and try to deny it and work around it. It takes time and a bit of distance for them to realize this is a good thing and that there are no guarantees when it comes to love. You just have to take the leap and have faith that things will work out. I can use this same prompt and turn it on myself.... what am I waiting for? I can also add in - 'What am I afraid of?' because those often go hand in hand. Fear stops me from taking the risk... for going for it.... for staying in my comfort zone. I want to challenge myself to stretch myself this year and go for it. Send my writing out in to the world. |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 15th Write your entry today about commitment. Committing to an activity, craft, person, way of being, etc. Consider the concepts of diligence, honesty, and responsibility. What does commitment look like to you? I think commitment is very important. I also know it is not an easy thing to do, particularly when things get rocky. I am still smarting from my marriage crumbling to pieces... not because of infidelity, but because we grew apart and I felt I could not measure up to the standards my ex had for me. I still feel like a failure in this area of my life. We were together 8 years before we got together and 16 years married before we separated 3 years ago. That was 24 years of my life committed to a relationship that eventually bottomed out. I try to tell myself it takes two, but I lived for many years with my ex blaming me for being the 'problem' in our marriage. I finally just got tired of it. He moved me out and I stayed gone. I think he might have thought I would have rallied to change and be what he wanted and come running back, but instead I backed away. I didn't want to be where I didn't feel loved and wanted. Even now, three years later, I keep feeling like that was a childish view of things, but away from him my family and friends began to tell me what they really thought of him and how different I was when I was with him. I had lost that piece of who I was and that bothered me. But apart from that.... I still feel I am a committed person. I continue to work in education, even though I haven't gotten my own permanent contract position. I am currently working in a long term occasional position in a special education class in a school I love to supply for... I am committed to them and I love feeling like I belong somewhere. I also love working with children who have special needs. I am committed to my writing, which is slowly coming along. When I was married, my ex was not a fan of me putting in time on something that was not making us money. His hobby, fixing cars, made money. He expected a tidy house, that he would not be embarrassed by, if we had other people over. I do clean, but I am not as fastidious as he was and I refused to let my world be swallowed up by constant tidying up after him. I will admit I could be a bit more on top of things, but still.... I was still learning my craft and feeling too small to put myself out there. Now, I take writing workshops, attend conferences and retreats and I have started to submit my writing out beyond the safe harbour of Writing.com. I have also made friends with people who are also writers... and they get me. It's nice to be understood. I am committed to my writing and my teaching career. I am committed to my family and to my friends... some I've known since kindergarten. It always bugged me that my ex didn't have any long term friends. I was his longest relationship outside his family.... and even some of them he stopped talking to for a time. I'm still not sure if this is a guy thing or if it was just him. I would also say I am committed to being a good person. To living my life in a way that lifts others up. That is why I love teaching and being part of a community of local writers. I am trying to be more committed to living healthier - eating good food and moving my body. I am trying to integrate more meditation and yoga into my life. I'm committed to be there for my mother so that she can continue to live in her own home. I am her calm when she starts getting anxious. I need to let the failures go. They are like a noose, forever making me feel that I am not good enough. I hate feeling not good enough. I hate feeling like I through away something good, when it was not always good and it changed me into something and someone I didn't always like. Maybe I just suck at love relationships... but the thing is I don't want to be alone forever.... I'm just afraid to put myself out their to try again. |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 14th Write about a time when you made a wrong assumption. Did you realize your mistake right away, or did someone tell you later? What did you learn from your mistake? Anytime I make an assumption I have learned not to assume because it makes an Ass of Me. I tend to ask for clarity whenever possible. I may come off as seeming like an idiot, but at least I avoid making too many assumptions. If I discover I have made a mistake I usually try to rectify the situation by being open and honest about my mistake. Most people take it well... and can see the humour in it. I often find I will make assumptions about the people here on WDC. When you don't know people, you make up an impression from their writing and their handle name. Sometimes that impression is pretty accurate, but sometimes it is way off. I have learned that not all people are like me just because they write. I can't white wash the world, nor would I want to.... but I think their is a tendency to do that type of thing. Being aware of that is the first step to realizing we all have prejudices and assumptions about others. It's a human tendency. I believe we all have much to offer beyond our outer shells. I try to look beyond, to the heart and mind of the person, if at all possible. I have encountered surprises along the way - I have found that some people may have a better grasp of the English language than I do and then I discover that English is their second language. That's impressive. I've also learned just because someone is a beautiful writer does not mean they are as old as I think they are. I have learned it is often a good idea to check a person's biography before responding. I remember reading someone's work and then discovering they were only 16 or 17. Impressive. I try to keep an open mind. I also try to pass on my appreciation of their gifts and talents. Everyone could use a positive boost from time to time. We are all individual and bring a flavour to our work. I want to taste the variety and be inspired to shine my own light in this sea of diversity. I also want to inspire others to shine their own lights into this world. We learn so much if we stay open to variety and diversity. |
30 Day Blog Challenge PROMPT January 13th In your entry today, write about games! Board games, video games, card games, sports games, mind games, etc... Share a memorable story. Games. Well, video games cause me too much stress.... I am talking Pac Man. I used to get so bent as those little creatures tried to get me. I swear my heart rate would go through the roof. Games like Doom gave me nightmares. Jenga is also stressful for me. Pick a piece and don't have anything fall down. Aren't games supposed to be fun and realizing ways to just chill?? I can play Words With Friends through Facebook and a few other games on my phone. As a child, an only child, I used to play Payday by myself. I would play as several people and I would take huge risks trying to get the little families to lose their shirts, but I found the more risks they took the bigger the advances they made. I do remember playing Clue with my babysitters daughter. She was three or four years older than me and always managed to win... though, who knows she could have been cheating. It used to bug me that I would never even come close to winning. I used to play cribbage with my grandmother in Timmins. I played rummy with her as well. I loved that. Card games were not allowed at my other grandparent's place. Apparently my grandfather was very against it for some reason. I've always liked the idea of creating my own board game. I am sure I played with the idea as a kid and as a teacher, I love it when the kids are able to create something that allows them to use their knowledge and work it into some kind of game. Those kind of games are fun.... any kind of learning game in the classroom is always fun. the students get a lot out of it as well. I've always been pretty good at trivia games. My ex used to be amazed at how much 'useless' information I had rattling around in my brain. Watching Jeopardy can be fun as I test my knowledge... and learn new stuff. So when it comes right down to it, I love games. They are fun. Even the stressful ones... because even with Jenga and Pac Man I had to laugh at myself and the friends who were around me at the time. Play on. |
30 Day Blog Challenge PROMPT January 11th Do you tend to be skeptical or trusting when meeting new people? Is your first impression of someone generally accurate, or does their true character surprise you? I would say I am trusting when meeting new people, but I would also have to clarify that by saying it depends who and where I am when I meet them. I would say my first impression is generally accurate, for the most part. I tend to get along with most people, but there are a few that send up flags of warning. One of those people is an EA in my class. She is a nice person, but there is a layer of caution I have when sharing information with her. Even when I first met her I was careful. Something didn't feel right. Then when we was she is suspected of being the one to report someone for a Facebook post... a situation that was quite innocent as a post, but seeing that we are educators, it went up the ranks at the Board Office and was investigated. I was surprised at first, but then when I took a bit of time to consider things... and she also told me she almost reported me when I said something under my breath in frustration one day. That made me reassess the situation and since then I take care in what I say and do around her. That investigation, by the way, came to nothing, but it made us be more cautious in what and how we say things to her. Innocent off hand comments can be misconstrued. Since we share the same birthday, I have found myself wondering if I do some of the things she does that bother me - like talking over other people in a conversation, or snapping at others when told repeatedly to do something (only because she hadn't acknowledged my request when I first made it) or arguing a point when we are trying to let her know that things have changed. I don't think I do these things, but I am more aware of not letting myself do them and breathing a few times when she does do them to me. I have never worked with anyone like this before. I also consider how I am going to tell her something so as not to ruffle her feathers or offend her. Don't get me wrong, she is a nice person and works well with the students, but I do find myself using caution. |
30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT January 10th What are some of the routines you follow in your daily life? Do you typically stick to your routine, or do you prefer more spontaneity? I tend to fall into routine quite well. I like to change things up on occasion, but even that has a pattern to it. I tried to set up a routine for the morning and evening with getting ready, but I was finding that moisturizing my face was bothering my eyes and making it hard for me to keep my eyes open so I have given it up in favour of finding a new routine once I am up for it... probably a variation on the old one. I work with students who have special needs, autism in particular and routine is very important to them. I find it calms me as well. Our classroom day follows the same routine so the children and the staff know what to expect. It makes things run better that way. We build any changes in slowly... if we are able. As for my writing, my preference is to work in cafes. I can write at home, but I like being out and about. Surrounded by the hum of others and the chance to people watch. Today I have chosen the library so that I don't spend so much money.... but our library does have a lovely café in it with good coffee and tea. The bonus with writing here is that I don't have to buy anything to be here and I do if I go to a café. Having already eaten too much today, I would prefer to not snack more. I tend to buy the same things when I go out to cafes. I will on occasion try something new, but I like the old familiars. I find even the people are more diverse in background and class here at the downtown Kitchener branch of the library. I went to an outlying branch that is attached to a high school which has an elementary school close by and the dynamic there was very different. More noisy with students talking to each other with headphones on... what's up with that. Any seniors seemed to know when to clear out for the day. There are also a few strange souls here at the downtown branch, but I find the library staff seems to check on them. They must be regulars. I overheard one staff ask a young man how he was doing today. Just a friendly check in. The Kitchener branch also has the Police Station right behind so I feel safe here. Even going to the downtown Waterloo library is different. It is smaller and I think it is more middle class oriented. That's just a feeling I get. When I am at the library I tend to sit in the same area - along the edge of the balcony overlooking the main area with the café. It is a great place to people watch and it also offers a wonderful view of the street as the wall in front of me is a bank of floor to ceiling windows. I love this library. I have wondered off topic. Routines. Routines also help me stay on track. Getting in regular walks, meditating and stretching all improve if I work them into a routine. If I don't, I tend to not do them as often as I should. With writing, I have a goal of writing 750 words a day. The website I do it on keeps track of my writing streak (currently at 190 days) and gives me stickers for my efforts. I don't have a routine time of doing my words, but I find I like taking a walk out and about to a café and then writing for a good while before walking back home. The walking helps me to work out story ideas and gets me out of the house and into the fresh air. Without that, particularly in the winter, I tend to get quite lethargic and feel like I am going stir crazy. Daily adventures help to keep me going. Where I go and what I do exactly is more spontaneous, but the routine of getting out is important. I don't want to stay home and slump around in my sweat pants on my days off. One day is fine, two... not so much. |
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