The Beautiful Dead

She lay there on the bed. She was still unconscious, but was once again beginning to stir. The room was dark except for a single bedside lamp that cast an amber glow over her body. I had checked the knots that secured her hands and ankles several times; making sure that she couldn’t get out. I quivered in excitement when my hand had brushed over her bare ankle. It was beautiful, perfect, and just that was why I had her now. She was a glorious specimen, but that was not the only reason why I had chosen her. She had been abused. Her inner beauty had died while her outer beauty had flourished. Oh, but now her eyes were flickering. She was straining against the knots that held her down. I moved out of the darkness and over to the bed where she lay. I sat down beside her and put a finger over her mouth.


“Don’t scream, I don’t like it when they scream. It sometimes makes me do things that I don’t like very much.”
She nodded so I removed my hand. She stayed silent for a moment, and then, in a barely audible whisper, she asked, “Why do you have me tied up? What have I done to you?”
“You haven’t done anything wrong. I am doing this for you. I am making your body match your soul.”
“What do you mean?” Tears started to slide down her face as she talked.
“You were the first one that I saw. You were to be my first. But then, your bastard of a boyfriend gave you that nasty black eye, and I just couldn’t allow that to go unpunished.”
“You…you were the one who killed Jake? You bastard, you dirty bastard. Let me out. Let me go now. Let me go!” Her voice rose considerable and she fought her constraints.
“You need to calm down, my beautiful, tortured Jessica. Remember not to speak too loudly. Although, since it seems like you are interested, I will tell you how it happened. I will tell you why Jake had to die. I wonder if you would have wished to know after I finish, though.” This thought made a smile seep slowly across my lips.


With that, I began my story. She was too exhausted to fight the knots anymore so she let herself fall back on the bed.


“I had spent the night faking glass after glass of booze at the party. I never drank any, but continued to act more and more drunk each time I saw someone again. I guess being good-looking and seemingly popular helped me accomplish this. I had seen Jake several times that evening, and he was getting quite drunk." I turned to Jessica and let my hand brush against her cheek. "I was already thoroughly aggravated with him. He had ruined your beauty; which put me at a horrible position. I couldn’t use you while you were marred. Anyway, after he had drunk what I assumed was his own weight in beer, I asked him to go into his guest room with me. He had slung his arm around me and said, “What can I do for you my friend. Great party out there isn’t it.”
“Yeah it is, but I am not hear to talk about the party.”
“…Then what is it man, come on I gotta get back out there.”
“I want to talk about Jessica.”
His expression changed. He appeared to be in thought but then he raised his head with a smile spread across his face.
“You know the only thing that bitch was good for was fucking. She could nag you to death if you ever let her start talking.”
“How dare you; you were the one who punched her weren’t you.”
“Well a guy has his needs, and she just couldn’t understand that, so I just had to…you know…knock some sense into her.”


"My mind was made up at that moment. He was the one that had defiled you in so many ways. It was his fault that I couldn’t use you. He would pay for what he had done to you. I put my hand in my jeans pocket. I felt the handle of the knife. The blade below had two edges; one was serrated and the other was smooth but just as sharp. Jake stood up from the bed and put his arm over my shoulder and said, “If that’s all man then I'm gonna go on back out. Some girls were eying me and they looked like they wanted to...well you know. Actually, come on out with me, I am sure one would want you.” He gave me a wicked gaze, and his smile widened. He laughed, and gave a small hiccup.


“Actually there is one more thing,” I said. I put one hand around his back, bracing him, and reached into my pocket. In one swift motion I drove the knife into his stomach. His eyes bulged open, and I felt his blood flow over my hand. Jake fell to his knees on the floor in front of me; the look on his face was one of astonishment. His hands came up to his face and he looked at the red stains that colored them. He dropped his hands and raised his head toward the ceiling. He was making this far too easy.
“Your God stopped loving you a long time ago Jake. I am just here to make sure that you pay for your sins. Its almost poetic isn’t it.” I brought the knife down again. This time the serrated edge slashed at his throat. Blood arced from this wound and splashed against the white walls. Jake fell backwards his lips still moving wordlessly. I knelt over him with the knife still clutched in my hand. His eyes were open still staring towards heaven. I brought my knife down on his right eye and gave it a quick twist as it popped through that soft orb. Blood pooled in the socket and spilled out over his face.
“There we go Jake, now you have paid with a blossom of your own.”


The music was still blaring from the party, and I had made sure that the door was locked as we had gone in. It would be quite a while before anyone found Jake. I grabbed a couple of tissues from the nightstand and used them to open the latch on the window. It was bitterly cold outside, but it couldn’t penetrate the warmth that now covered my hands, and the feeling that was now stationed deep in my chest.”


“So what do you think Jessica? Do you still think I was so callous in my actions.”
Tears began to flow down her face, and she was trying hard to contain loud sobs.
"Now tell me, did you let him? Did you let him do that to you?"
Her tears came faster as she nodded her head.
"That was not a good answer, Jessica. It makes me very unhappy to hear you say that. I had thought that you were better than that. But I suppose that that's why I chose you, because you were so beautiful but your soul was so dirty."


She spoke, "Did you kill Ashley too? Did you kill her like you killed Jake? You did, didn't you. You killed both of them."
"Don't try to change the subject, you little bitch. You are not in charge here." I was getting very angry. Before I could stop myself, I had thrown one of the unlit lamps across the room. It shattered against the wall and fell in pieces to the floor. It helped my anger somewhat, and I turned to face her again. "I am truly sorry, but I did warn you about talking back to me, didn't I. I told you that it made me angry. But, since you asked, yes, I did kill Ashley. Do you want to know why she had a closed casket funeral? Well, lets just say that she wasn't as compliant as Jake."


She gasped and I began to speak.
"After I couldn't take you, because of your black eye, I began to look for someone else. I needed someone who was just as tortured and was just as outwardly beautiful. Someone who needed their soul to be made beautiful. Someone who needed a release from life; it would have been such a waste to not use my gift. I found that in Ashley. As you know probably know, she was a rather slutty bitch. Oh, don't shake your head Jessica; you know she did nothing to hide it. Why do you think she was always disappearing into the guy's football locker room? I can tell you that it wasn't because she had to get her books. Did you know that that was what she loved about college? It was her chance to fuck an entire population of males in four years. Did she ever tell you that? That's what she told me. But of course, she did have the looks. Even I can't deny that. That's how I got her. I let her think that she was going to bag me; that I would be one more mark on her wall. Of course, me being good looking didn't hurt. How could she have known that it was to be her own personal judgment day?" Jessica was shedding little tears down her face. I found it almost sweet that she cared so much for that whore.


I didn't bring her here. No, this bed was reserved for you. But, she didn't care where we went, so I took her down to the emergency shelter. There were plenty of cots. I told her that I wanted to play a game, and she was more than willing to comply. After I tied her up, I pulled out the knife; you should have seen how it glowed in the lamplight. Ashley wasn't too happy, to say the least. As soon she realized what was going on she began to scream bloody hell. I couldn't let us be discovered, so I gagged her with her own socks. You should have seen her face, the look of her helplessness was priceless.
I removed her clothes. I let her body be bathed in that small amount of light. She was beautiful, and her flesh was wonderfully tight. Don't give me that look Jessica; I didn't take advantage of her. There was nothing erotic about her. Like I told you only her outer body had any appeal, and I wanted much more than that. I didn't know why she was so reluctant. Is death so scary? I do so look forward to mine. But she continued to struggle fiercely with the knots, but like yours they held strong.


I was getting very angry with Ashley by now so I told her how I felt, "Well I hope you are happy Ashley. It was going to be so simple, and you went and fucked it all up. You would have been my second favorite, but now you will just die ugly. I wanted to make you radiant, but you don't deserve that now. Quite crying, you little bitch. That's all you seem to know how to do: scream and cry, scream and cry, scream and cry. Why don't you just shut up for a change? All its doing is making me more angry your tears won't make me pity you."


I reached to the bedside table and picked my knife back up. I brought it down on her bare chest. Not forcefully, at least, not yet. I rested the tip just on top of her skin. The point was now right on her sternum. She tried to scream but no sound made it through the gag. I pushed a little harder; a small pool of blood blossomed around the blade. I moved the knife over her skin pushing just hard enough to make blood bead out in the pattern that I was tracing. I wanted her to feel the pain. Tears were once again streaming from her eyes. I traced around her breasts pushing a little harder as I went. My flowing lines became more jagged and irregular. None of this was sensual and none of it aroused me. It was business, business that the bitch had made far less enjoyable. She now had wonderful crimson lines on her fair white skin. Her pain, on the other hand, was making me quite happy. It was almost blissful.


Apparently, the pain too much for her and she passed out right there. I knew how to fix that though. I brought the knife to her left collarbone and pushed in. I cut away the skin until I could see her heart beating beneath her ribs. Her body had started to shake as I did this. I reached in my hands and broke the ribs that were in my way. They were surprisingly brittle. Her body was shaking worse now; I supposed shock was setting in. I put my hand over her heart. Blood was pouring from her by this point, but I knew exactly where to place my hand. I let the beating guide me.


I let my hand rest gently on her heart for a moment, and then I gave it a slight squeeze. The result was instantaneous; a spasm racketed her entire body. I squeezed harder strangling the organ that pumped her wonderful red life. It began to beat slower, and slower, and slower until it was just a feeble patter. I closed my hand into a fist, and felt her heart explode in my iron grasp. Her body flew up and her eyes opened before she fell back onto the bed. Her blood now covered me up to my forearms, and much more had rocketed forth when she had died. What I didn't like was that her eyes were still open, and they didn't look very appreciative. I fixed that with two quick stabs of my knife. How appropriate that I would leave her while she was "crying" once again. I got up from the cot and looked at her once more. Regardless of how I had tried, she still looked quite beautiful in the end. There was nothing that I could do to fix that now. I left the shelter and came back here. Her blood, her wonderful crimson life dried on my hands that night as I slept. Look below you Jessica, you can still see it on the sheets."


I showed her my hands, which still had traces of that wonderful red stain.
She started crying again. I didn't know whether I blamed her or not. I had put her through a lot, but she was the one who had asked.
"It alright my sweet Jessica, you are going to be joining them very soon."
I picked up the knife and approached where she lay. I asked her if she was ready. I took the futile attempt to break the knots to be a yes. I raised the knife and brought it down towards her.


As it was about to enter her skin a sharp knock echoed from the door.
Someone spoke from outside, "This is the police. Is there a Ben Johnson in there?"
"Yes officer, I am in here."
"Will you let us in, someone reported a loud noise from your dorm room and we would like to check it out."
"I am afraid that I can't help you out officer. You see I have this pretty young lady in here and I don't want to disappoint her."
"Open the door now son or we will have to break it down."
Jessica took the chance to yell out, "Officer help me, please, he wants to kill me."
"You bitch, how dare you. I told you not to talk."
The door splintered inward and two policemen were standing in the doorway with their guns drawn. My knife was still at Jessica's throat.
"Put the knife down, Ben," one of the officers called to me.
"Yes sir, anything you say."


I drove the knife into Jessica's throat before she had a chance to scream. The policemen's reaction was immediate. Both fired their guns. I saw the bullets coming toward me, and made no attempt to move out of the way. I felt such an exquisite pain as they passed through my body. I fell backward, my blood arcing up as I did so. So this is what it was like to die. This is what it was like to be beautiful. I didn't know why the others were so reluctant. It was a wonderful feeling. I only regretted that I could only feel it once. I saw the room grow cloudy around me. It was wavering into darkness. I wanted the darkness, I beckoned it to come and take me. In that last moment, in that second before my breath stopped, I could feel myself smiling.