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by Goober Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR · Poetry · Comedy · #932761
One of my promised homework excuse poems, also written in the 7th grade.
"I'm telling you, Miss Crabapple,"
Cried poor Simon in despair,
Clutching the leash, holding that horrible beast,
"He ate my homework, I swear!"

"Just listen for a couple of minutes,
I'll tell you the strangest tale,
I'm sure you'll believe, and won't get peeved,
And with proof, I definitely won't fail.

"I did the assignment,
I know 'cuz I did it at dawn,
I did it quick, while the clock ticked,
I didn't know it would soon be gone.

"He snatched it off the table,
While I was eating my eggs,
I hunted him down, and chased him around,
While I begged, and begged, and begged.

"I pursued him around the neighborhood,
And all over our backyard,
I scraped my knee, trying to climb a tree,
I couldn't get to him, it was too hard.

"Then he ate it all up,
He swallowed it down,"
Simon finished, looking diminished,
Holding the leash with a frown.

He held up the leash,
For Miss Crabapple to see,
While it wriggled, and it jiggled,
And tried to break free.

"Interesting story," Miss Crabapple said.
Frowning down at Simon's "beast,"
And said, "But before I go, I want to know,
Why is your little brother wearing that leash?"
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