Broken

Jimmy sat in the chair by the window, watching the only girl he had ever fallen in love with committedly. Lisa was the wife of one of his clients, but she had cheated on him and the marriage would soon be over. Jimmy never said it but he knew as soon as he saw her for the first time he would love her and only her for as long as either of them would live.

He watched her as she lied on the bed in her hotel room, her legs crossed and a cigarette resting lazily between her lips. He watched the smoke drift out of her nose and her fingers fidgeting with her belly button ring. He wanted so badly to touch her, to lie with her, but could not stand to upset the image in front of him.

No words were exchanged between Jimmy and Lisa. Only thoughts. Emotions. Jimmy could not get her out of his mind. He had work to finish — incidentally, for Lisa's husband — but could do nothing but sit and smile. He had never felt so close to Lisa. Every second, every moment Jimmy spent in that room was filled with thoughts of her. Lisa hardly seemed to even notice he was there.

She got up and stretched her arms toward the ceiling, bringing her tee shirt up far enough to expose her midriff. When he said her name she turned to him with unfocused eyes. She walked to the window and searched the street below anxiously. Jimmy could smell the mixture of cigarette smoke and expensive perfume she always wore. The odor was exhilarating to Jimmy; he preferred breathing it in over oxygen.

He shut his eyes and moved his hand out toward her, holding his breath, longing to feel her body like it would be the last time. He reached but found nothing but the cold night air filtering in through the open window.

Jimmy let out a deep sigh and reopened his eyes to the sight of Lisa disrobing. She tore off all but the blue thong he watched her put on after she stepped out of the shower an hour earlier.

Jimmy felt his heart hit his chair and bounce up into his throat. His lips slowly spread apart and formed a wide smile, his eyes searching her bare body from her pink painted toenails to the brown hair wrapped loosely atop her head.

But just as quickly as the tee shirt and shorts came off, the short white dress came on. Lisa looked at the woman in the mirror and smiled at her. Jimmy realized she never thought of asking him how she looked and probably wouldn't have cared even if she did.

Jimmy sat in the chair by the window, watching the only girl he had ever fallen in love with committedly. He watched as she ran to the door, threw it open, and wrapped her arms around and buried her lips in the mouth of a man he did not recognize.

Jimmy could hear the blood pulsing through his body. He looked away and pretended to study the paint on the wall. When he looked back up he found the two lying on the floor, clothes already coming off. The sound of Jimmy's heart being torn apart drowned out the sounds of everything else.

Lisa never loved him. This much was clear to Jimmy now. It wasn't hard to figure out, with her making love to another man right in front of him.

Jimmy buried his head in his hands and sobbed silently. The world seemed to be in his hand ten minutes ago but now it had been taken from him. He squeezed his head and let out a heartbroken cry.

When he could finally manage it, he put his eye back up to the scope. The man had already left the apartment. Lisa was alone now, fully clothed, holding another cigarette to her lips with a glint in her eyes. She was still beautiful.

"I loved you," Jimmy thought, out loud. She turned towards him again and walked to the window. She did not see Jimmy in the window two floors up and across from her; she gazed down at the street with a satisfied smile.

Jimmy rested his finger on the trigger of his rifle. "I really did."

Pulling the trigger was always the easiest part. Just squeeze, like they taught at the academy. The bullet hit Lisa on the bridge of her nose. Her body fell back a few feet. Small pieces of her head were strewn about the room.

Jimmy stared for a few seconds and was not satisfied. She had taken her last breath, had her last thought, loved her last man. She was long gone. But still, Jimmy was not satisfied. Fpt. Fpt. The second and third shots were unnecessary but they made Jimmy feel temporarily better.

Tears silently rolled down Jimmy's face as he unscrewed the silencer and disassembled the rest of the rifle and packed it into its carrying case.

He walked to the bedside table and picked up his cell phone and dialed Lisa's husband.

"It's done. Yes, she's gone. Meet me at Terminal D at O'Hare tomorrow at noon. Yes. You too."

"Wait. What do you know about the guy she's been with? Uh huh. Okay. Let me write this down. Okay. Thanks. I'll do him for free."

Jimmy sat down on the bed and cried.

After an hour, he pulled the rifle out of the case and put it back together.

Jimmy sat in the chair by the window, watching the only girl he had ever fallen in love with committedly.