A woman

A girl
with the weight of her mistakes on her eye lids,
Plopped on to her bed.
Sore muscles
Ripped and torn from her bone,
A juicy slab of
Bloody meat,
Waiting for the dogs
To come home.
She is enclosed in this
rectangular prism,
Lonely corners tinted with blue.
tinted
with growing shadows
of the same hue
the kind of shadows
that light could never create.
And she thought
She was too strong
To love
But really,
she is too weak
To hate.

I tried to let go for you,
To give in to some surreal
Emotionless
Masculinity,
With the idea in mind
That strength would triumph
And leave me satisfied.
But, I left reality
zipped up
in my
bookbag,
locked
in my high school locker
and theres no way
i'm going
back.

Truth of the matter is,
I can’t bend to fit you
Or even pretend
That I can,
Because despite how far my body can flex
I can’t sacrifice my smiles
to satisfy
a man.

A woman
with the knowledge of her past
resting on her mattress
has imbued with her dreams,
and the memories
that try to convince her
that shes not alone;
she's free.