Tortured Existence

“Tortured Existence”

Tortured Existence, isn’t that what you said?
And I know it all too well, lying in the bed
Hoping and dreaming and wishing for something more
than just this “tortured existence” that I abhor.

Delusions and fantasies; I just want to cry
Images of just you and I…
Aspiring to be all you could ever want,
Wishing you would change your mind, but I know you won’t.

Tortured existence, down at your feet,
No longer caring to be discreet,
Asking for your affectionate feelings,
Not just touching and feeling
and some (possibly) insanely incredible fucking.

But you know I will never beg,
And I suppose I’ll take what I can get.
I am always here, no matter what,
And you could treat me like any slut
I would still take you in and give you what you need,
I am a fool, a fool indeed.
I would love you and hold you and then let you leave,
Guess that’s all you need from me…

There can be nothing more,
or that’s what you said.
But I still want to see you,
And that’s kind of sad.

I’ve enjoyed this change that has come over you,
I love how we converse now,
Our words have been too few…

But now you will probably leave me
I’ve scared you away
with this stupid poem that I’ve written this day.
Lord…I don’t know…
Please stay.