Boredom and such ... Woooo! so bored.

I am soooooooooo bored!

Man nothing to do here. Pshhhhhhh man this couch is comfy. Maybe that’s my problem. Maybe I’m not bored. Maybe I’m just lazy.

Well that can’t be it … maybe I’m both. Yes that is it I’m, oh how do the French say? Ah yes “hermaphradital” not in the sense that I have both set of genitalia, but more in the sense that I am both lazy and bored.

That poses a great philosophical question, Am I lazy because I’m bored? Or am I bored because I’m lazy? Man my head hurts after that one. I would ponder it more but I’m just too lethargic … plus the topic doesn’t interest me.

Oh wow is that a Cheeto? I wonder how long that has been there. Hmm I don’t see any mold on it, I wonder if it is still … “Crunch!” … Ah yes tastes as good as one right out of the bag. Eww gross did I just eat a Cheeto from the floor? Man I wonder how many cockroaches have feasted off that. And how much fecal mater has accumulated on it? Oh God I hope I don’t die. Happy thoughts Josh my man, happy thoughts.

Sweet I Dream of Jeanie is on, That Barbara Eden sure is hot! Not now of course, she must be in her 60’s. Man I wish they would change the speed limit around here to at least 60 miles per hour. Speaking of hour, that Faith Hill special is on in an hour. Hmm, I wonder if her parents would have named her Bunker if she would have kept it as her stage name. And the winner of the Grammy is … Bunker Hill. Wow that would be great. You know what would be great right now … doughnut holes. I wonder why they call them doughnut holes, I mean they aren’t really holes of doughnuts, they’re more like plugs. They should call them doughnut plugs! Yeah that would be a much better name.

I wonder why they didn’t call them that? Oh well I guess that’s just one of those mysteries that will never be solved, like the last number in pi or how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

And speaking of pop why do people from up north and the Midwest call it pop anyways? That doesn’t sound too appetizing to me, makes me think of a rupture. I wouldn’t want to drink something I thought would rupture my stomach. I could use some soda now though I think that Cheeto is making my tongue swell a bit. But man I would have to get up and walk all the way to the fridge. I wish I had one of those handicap dogs … not a handicapped dog, but one of those dogs handicapped people have. That would be so great then I wouldn’t have to move. But I would have to wait like 3 years on that list to get a dog. Maybe I can steal one from a blind person. As long as they aren’t like Dare Devil, I would feel pretty stupid getting my ass kicked by a blind guy.

Sweet is that another Cheeto! “Crunch” … Mmmm that was as good as the first! Holy crap that wasn’t a Cheeto … Oh God, oh God where is my pet grasshopper? F-U-D-G-E … I ate Mr. Hoppy! Great now I’m sad. I think I will go to sleep now, but not in my bed, that would again require me to get up and walk all the way over to the bedroom. I will just fall asleep on the couch.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ