Blind Man Can See

Blind Man Can See

“Do you know any blind men?” I could see that my questioner was himself blind and that he knew I was not. He was carrying a walking stick on his left arm and was being chaperoned by a slim lady about the same age as he was.

I cautiously replied, “I have known a few blind people in my life, but really if you mean to ask me whether I have any friends who are blind, the answer is no. Why?”

“Well, did you know why blind men can’t go scuba diving?”

The lady appeared somewhat embarassed at her companion’s volubility. I was still trying to figure out which way this conversation was headed and what role I was expected to play in it. The man did not seem to be speaking particularly to me, just to anyone who would listen and respond. I don’t think he had any idea of my race, color, nationality or even gender when he started the conversation. He obviously could not get visual clues as to the degree of my ability to comprehend his effulgent flow of words. And I am sure he could not care less. I was able to analyze what he was saying only after a brief time lag. Lack of eye contact was not helping any.

“I guess I don’t”.

“Because their guide dog is afraid of water, that’s why!”

Ah, so that is what it was. He was posing riddles to me. In a somewhat foolish bid to outsmart him, I countered, “But if the guide dog were blind as well, it would not be afraid of the water, right?”

“Then it wouldn’t be a very smart guide dog, would it?”

“Yes, it could, too. Guide dogs rely upon their sense of smell more than anything else.” There was an element of bluff in this statement. What do I know about guide dogs, anyway?

By now I had realized that I should have been quieter. It is bad manners to argue or guess someone’s joke. But he did not seem to mind at all and, almost interrupting me, proceeded to his next one,

“What kind of dogs do not bite?”

Suddenly, I was reminded of the adage, “barking dogs seldom bite” and was about to give “a barking dog” a chance. But, having understood his game by now, and resolved not to spoil the ball he was having with this conversation, I only hmm’ed thoughtfully, and enquired, “Oh, what kind?”

“ Hot dogs!”

Ha, ha!, I thought to myself. Give me a cheaper one.

“Oh yeah, instead you bite the hot dog,” I said, humoring him, but he was already in the middle of his next one.

“How does a hot dog talk to you?”

By this time, his lady companion was beginning to show signs of impatience. This was obviously not her first time hearing these riddles.

“I sure don’t know, how?”

“Frankly! Hot dogs are frankfurters, you know!” The man was now gleefully chuckling savoring his ability to recount the riddles like a true pro, keeping me on my toes.

“Yes, I do.” I inwardly admitted that this was a sharp one, my interest rekindled.

“Why do I put my money in the refrigerator as soon as I get home?”

“Why?”

“Because I like cold cash.!”

“I would rather not cool my cash like that. Hey, don’t you remember that Marilyn Monroe film title? Some Like It Hot? I like mine hot, too.” I don’t remember if I had even seen the movie. It just seemed a smart and risque kind of thing to say.

At this point, his lady chaperon led him on and away from me. But I was left musing. “I will give him this much,” I thought to myself. “This blind man sure could see how to make the most of life.”




- ghanshyam

7-2-03