Bear it

"Whose idea was this?"

"Your mother's, now be quiet."

"Mothers are silly. They shouldn't have invented mothers."

"If your mother hadn't pushed it, you wouldn't have had the main role."

"I don't want the main role."

"You'll be grateful later."

"To wear this bear costume in which I boil? No thank you. Look, everyone else is dressed but I have to put it on just before I go on stage so I don't melt."

"Okay, three minutes to stage time. Get your costume on now!"

"OW!"

"What's up?"

"This zipper, this zipper, I cant pull it! It broke, it broke!"

"That's your cue, you have to be on stage NOW."

"I can't go half bear half human in underwear!"

"That rhymes."

"Are you thinking of rhymes now? At a time like this?"

"Heck, that's your exit cue they're saying and you haven't even entered."

"I can't get this thing on or off. I'll be half a boiled bear all my life."

"Listen, they're applauding!"

NEXT DAY's HEADLINE:
School play wins 'best script award'.
Seriously philosophical question of how to bear the missing bear makes audience think.