Drifter 9 Be Careful What You Wish For 2

The members of the expedition cried out in horror. More cries of terror followed as several of them drew their sidearms and opened fire. Whether rays or slugs, nothing had any effect on the strange being from the vault, dissipating harmlessly or pinging off of him, failing to so much as damage his robes.
Another member of the team strode forward, an arrogant smile on his face, “I have a wish!”
“Don’t do it, it’s a trick,” Ulo warned him.
“Don’t worry,” he assured Ulo, before turning to the grinning being, “I wish for wealth. How could being wealthy ever be a bad thing?”
A cold stare and that same grin from the being, “Granted.”
The man that had wished for money went to a nearby com terminal. He cheered and danced when he discovered that his bank account now had a tremendous amount of money in it, enough to buy several star systems.
Next, a bright-eyed young womon approached the mysterious being, “I am a historian. I wish to have total knowledge of my people’s history,” then she quickly added, “As long as that knowledge isn’t too much for my mind to contain.”
The grin stayed in place as the entity from the vault granted the wish.
Pure joy on the woman’s face, “The gardens of Hakeen! The palaces on the endless plains! The painters of Tenold! It’s all so wonderous!”
The gathering looked around at each other in satisfaction. The wheels in their minds began to turn.
But then her expression changed to horror, “The massacre at Bellant! The massacre at Sacred Orchard! The Fifth Unification war! Oh God! The Rutan-Kat war! The trenches! Three decades in the trenches! The dungeons under the palaces! They were so desperate during the siege of Vaarren that they ate each other! Oh God, the death squads during the purge of Goltarka!”
After that she fell into a stupor, staring at nothing and ranting in a low voice. She had needed to be fed and cared for by others since then.
A beeping sound signaled to the horrified onlookers that an urgent message had been received. Someone went to the coms terminal. The man who had wished for wealth was under investigation. The authorities wanted to know why his account had suddenly gained so much money.
But it got much worse. The sudden appearance of so much money had caused an economic crash on his home world. Rioters filled the streets and there had been several terror attacks. Worst of all, the man’s wife and child had been killed when the police raided his home. He drew his sidearm and ended himself on the spot.
Over the course of the next few days there were many other failed wishes. Just when they had thought that there wouldn’t be any more takers, another would fall victim to the temptation. And the being from the vault was always trying his best to entice them into asking for something.
“It’s a Monkey’s Paw,” Eli proclaimed, briefly pausing so that they could consider the translator’s explanation of the story, “I’m going to sit this one out,” then he turned and started walking toward an unoccupied cot.
“Captain Cisneros,” the grinning being called out, “I could give you anything. All you have to do is ask.”
He kept walking, “Thanks, but no thanks. I’ve already got everything I need.”
“I could destroy the Sad’Daki. I could restore the Earth. Or perhaps revive your fallen comrades.”
Eli said nothing, just kept on walking.
The being from the vault kept going, “I could bring back your loved ones.”
He stopped and half turned, bringing the being into view. The smile seemed to somehow be even wider, maybe even a bit vicious. After a few long seconds, Eli broke out into riotous laughter. No one joined in his maniacal display of mirth. Still chortling, he settled down onto the cot.
Quibib the lawyer turned back to his client, “I still don’t understand why I’ve been asked to come here.”
“It’s simple. This being sabotages every wish, just like how your friend said. You are an expert in legal matters. You can, just as you would draft a clause in a contract or a piece of legislation, properly word a wish that this demonic thing can’t find a way to corrupt.”
The lawyer sat there in silence, contemplating this strange new assignment. Eli watched as the man’s disposition gradually morphed from confusion to dread. It was as if whatever passed for the alien’s blood slowly froze.
The grinning one spoke, “I can help you, all you have to do is ask.”
Resolve replaced the trepidation on the lawyer’s face. He sat down and got to work.

***

After four long hours the lawyer read the final draft of the wish, “I, insert keyword here, for exactly one hundred million Atlath sterling to be placed in my immediate possession in such a way that it cannot be taken from me except via purchases, which all authorities or any other persons will believe to have been obtained via legal and totally legitimate means, and that those means in themselves carry no negative consequences, lethal or otherwise, for myself, my loved ones, any innocent individual, any and all communities or organizations of any size, up to and including the entirety of this or any other universe or time period.”
Satisfied that nothing had been left out, Ulo carefully read the paragraph, inserting the word wish.
The being’s grin stayed in place, even as it gave them a look of resignation. A pallet appeared in the room. It was stacked high with ornate boxes. Ulo approached it cautiously. With great trepidation, he opened one of the boxes. It was full of the little silver bars that served as the currency of the Atlath empire.
The lawyer and the archaeologist stood there waiting. Eli’s gaze moved back and forth from Ulo to the pallet of money. Ulo seemed fine. Nothing happened to the money. The coms terminal made no sounds. The pair gave each other looks of pure joy. The smiling thing could be beaten!
The pair sat about formulating the next wish. After an hour Ulo approached the smirking being, “I wish that my body will immediately and painless be of exceptional beauty according to the standards of my people, that it has great athletic prowess, that it have no negative health issues, that it not experience undo pain, that it not age, that it should be hardy, that my genitals be of a size and shape that females of my species find most pleasing, that no part of my body emit a foul odor or liquid, and that I be able to resist any and all diseases.”
The change was instantaneous. Ulo jumped as his body suddenly underwent a drastic alteration. Although Eli thought that he still looked unsightly, the archeologist now looked like he could take on an army or win any contest of strength or endurance.
“What about the others here, the ones that were harmed by poorly thought out wishes?” Eli asked. They ignored him, focusing on the wording of the next wish.
After a few minutes Ulo spoke triumphantly, “I wish for a woman of my species, of exceptional beauty, who has a great personality, who is extremely loyal, who carries herself well, who is a skilled lover, but is also still a virgin, who is young and healthy, and will always remain so.”
The woman appeared out of nothing. Eli didn’t find her to be attractive, but the archeologist certainly did. He moved toward her with great haste. The two embraced. Suddenly, she drew a hidden dagger and thrust it into his heart. Ulo fell dead.
“That was for Professor Holukeen,” she yelled, before fading out of existence.
“What happened?” the lawyer asked, in total shock.
Eli got up, “He got greedy, took too many chances. The wish was that she would be loyal, but you forgot to specify that this loyalty should be to him. Come on, let’s gather up the survivors and get off of this planet.”
They did just that. The being from the vault tried to tempt them the entire time. Even as the last person was helped up the boarding ramp, he stood there making offers.
They took off and went into low orbit. There they sat while the lawyer carefully prepared a warning message, which would be broadcast by a beacon they would leave behind. It would circle the planet for millennia, alerting travelers to the danger below.
Eli told Quibib that it was a pointless effort. No matter what warning they left, some people would see it as an attempt to hide something. They would think that whoever left the message was trying to scare them away from some treasure. Many would see it as an invitation.
The lawyer agreed but kept working on the message anyway. When he finished, they set course for a more populated star system, one with decent medical facilities.