The Tail

If I were you I would not laugh,
or scoff at cat's condition
For sometimes truth's not as you think,
It's often stranger than fiction

Now this cat will tell his story,
please, it’s neither grim nor gory
Yet it has a certain glory,
if you’ll stay to hear “The Tail”

Of a boxer named O’Rocky,
not a dog you stupid donkey
But our kitty who loves Roxy,
that foxy, sexy gal

See, he works as an enforcer,
collecting debts for “Claws” McForster
Who’s a loan shark and a mobster
and the top cat in his town

Claws has eyes for sweet Miss Roxy,
but O’Rocky, he’s got moxy
Boss or not that neutered kitty shark
Will have no Roxy tail

Enter tiger striped Apollo Breed,
In town to fight the fight
That will keep him in the record books,
that cat has quite a right!

O’Rocky jogs both day and night,
he claws the post till noon
He runs with weights tied to his tail,
his muscles grow and bloom

Fight night arrives, the time has come,
O’Rocky's love is true
The Rock holds Roxy in his heart,
He’ll win his Russian Blue

The kitties leap from rope to canvas entering the ring,
they prance and jab (they’re warming up) they’re readying to spring
Go Rock! yells Mick (a tabby cat who’s coaching Rock to fame)
Apollo says, dis cat is mine - he looks a little tame


They ring the bell, the round is one, the kitties hiss and leap,
O’Rocky rights and lefts and jabs - Apollo seems asleep!
But suddenly Apollo wakes, and takes the fight to Rock
they snarl and meow and let fur fly, the stadium doth rock

Our hero hesitates at first but knows what he must do,
he retracts his claws and draws guffaws and fans begin to boo
O’Rocky loops his tail round and yanks Creed off his feet,
Then whips him senseless whilst he’s yelling (Roxxxy!!) in relief

So now you see the truth my friends, there’s no reason to laugh,
O’Rocky won his Russian Blue and it was not perchance
The moral of this story is (and please don’t call a foul)
When you’re a cat who’s after tail you don’t throw in the towel