My Experience with Bipolar Disorder

         I just read an amazing story about bipolar disorder by JPR17. If you haven't already done so, I hope you will read it soon. The ID is 229617.

         I also have bipolar disorder. It almost killed me twice. Fortunately I failed each time due to a few amazing friends and a great therapist. I used to say "suffer from bipolar" but with therapy and the right medication, it's much easier to deal with. Though it can have it's down side at times. Because I'm usually happy and can make people laugh, when I have an occasional low period of time, most people don't know or forget that I'm bipolar, and they say I'm being to sensitive which usually just makes me angry or really annoyed.

         I live in a senior apartment complex and I love it here. For a while I would go down to the lobby at 4:00 pm because a small group of my neighbors would meet there everyday. I was excited at first because I felt that I was part of something fun. Unfortunately, that was short lived. Almost daily someone would do or say something that would hurt or really annoy me (which led to the "You're too sensitive comments"). So I stopped going. I'm still friends with most of them. However, I've been much happier since I left the "group" Which doesn't surprise me. I never liked group therapy either. One, because I'm very empathetic and can feel other people's pain and second, I finally had to admit to myself that I like to be the center of attention. Not egotistically, but because that's when I feel like I'm worth something (still working on the second reason...LOL)

         Most of the time I'm happy with myself, but sometimes something will trigger me and I'll start spiraling down. Now a days I can catch myself before I get to low.

         I no longer feel ashamed about being bipolar. As my therapist told me, it's no different than being diabetic or having any other disease. I didn't choose this disorder but I'm able to function pretty well with it. Again, thanks to friends and therapy.

         If anyone reading this has this disorder, don't be ashamed and if you can afford it, get therapy. It can be very beneficial because you can say how your feeling and they have to listen to you! Seriously though, if you're lucky enough to find a good therapist like I did, it can help you in so many ways. Either in a group session or a one on one session if that's what you prefer.

         I hope this can help someone's day better like JPR's did for mine.