TANK DRIVER

         Andrew MacLeod                    15

TANK DRIVER

FIRST DRAFT

TANK DRIVER

FIRST DRAFT

















ANDREW MACLEOD

INT. COLLINS HOUSE – DAY

COLLIN is sitting inside his house at the dinner table reading the paper. The décor of the house doesn't seem to have changed much from the 1950's. There are few old war pictures on the walls with World War Two veterans posing beside tanks and a couple of wedding photo's of Collin as a young man and his wife. Collin has snowy grey hair combed back from the scalp. Blue eyes and red faced complexion. He is dressed tidily, in grey flannel trousers and tweed shirt.
As he is reading the telephone rings. He picks up the receiver. The caller is his daughter JANET. Her voice can be heard from the mouth piece.

JANET
(on phone)
Hi Dad its Janet.

COLLIN
Oh Jan, alright luv?

JANET
Actually good Dad. Dave is out
today. He's home now.

COLLIN
I'll be interested to know how long
for this time.

JANET
Don't be like that please. He's
out that's what matters.

COLLIN
Well he better be straight into
a job. No faffing about.

JANET
Don't worry he's off to the job
centre next week. Anyway the
reason I'm ringing is to see if
you wanted to have a dinner this
evening. Its been ages since the
boys have seen you.

COLLIN
Well I suppose I could pop round for
an hour. I have a meeting with the
chaps tonight at the club.

JANET
Only an hour with your family?
Surely you can miss one night with
your old war mates. All you do is
talk about how it was in the war...


COLLIN
You should be more grateful...

JANET
I know, I know I have heard it all
before Dad. Just come round about
six ok?

COLLIN
Yes alright.

INT. JANET'S FLAT – DAY

Two young boys ROBBIE and FRED are sitting in front of a TV in there parents flat playing video games. The flat is in a council estate. Its generally messy with toys and clothes strewn around. There father DAVE is sprawled on the couch watching the two boys play while smoking a cigarette.
Dave is mid 30's, heavy and thick set. He has pale blotchy skin and thinning blonde hair with blue eyes. He has tattoo's on his arms. There is an open can of beer beside him on the coffee table. He encourages one of the boys in a cockney accent.

DAVE
That's it Robbie stick it to him
son.

The boys ignore Dave, absorbed in the game.
There's a noise of clattering dishes and JANET appears in the lounge hurriedly drying a plate with a tea towel.
Janet is in her early forties, slim and of medium height. She has brown eyes and hair and lined skin of a heavy smoker. She has a worried frown on her face.

JANET
Dave get rid of that lager.
Dad will be here soon.

Dave doesn't move a muscle as he replies.

DAVE
What's that grumpy old geezer
want? To lecture me again?

JANET
I invited him around to have
dinner with us and I want you
to be nice to him.

DAVE
Why? He never does anything for
us. When I went to prison he could
have bailed me out! But did he? No!

JANET
Well you could hardly expect him
to! Anyway he's never liked you.

DAVE
Yeah well at least he could have
moved out of that massive old house.
Let you and the boy's live there. Even
now he could. Its not like he's
getting any younger!

Janet resigned heads back into the small kitchen with the plate.

JANET
He'll never move out. I asked him
when my Mum died. He told me he
would be cold in the ground before
we got the house.

DAVE
Tight old bastard, making us wait
until he keels over!

JANET
Don't talk about my father like that.

DAVE
Well I don't want to live in this dog
box forever!

Before Janet can reply there is a knock at the door. Janet answers to find Collin on the landing. She lets him inside. Collin greets the two boys who barely glance up from there video game.

COLLIN
Hello boys.

He sits down beside Dave who grunts acknowledgement at him.
DAVE
Alright Granddad.

COLLIN
(evenly)
Very well thank you David. I see
prison hasn't toughened you up
any.

Dave ignores Collin. Janet attempts to make conversation.

JANET
Well it was only a few months.
Dave thinks he might get a job
with the council.

Collin looks sharply at Janet when she mentions the word council.

COLLIN
Don't mention the bloody council
to me.

JANET
Why?

COLLIN
I walked out to get the papers
this morning and what did I find
but one of those snivelling parking
wardens ticketing my motor.

JANET
Oh Dad how much?

COLLIN
Fifty pounds. But I mean to
complain.

DAVE
Your wasting your time Granddad.
They won't lift a finger.

Janet puts down the plate and tea towel to kneel in front of Collin.

JANET
Oh Dad having that old car is
costing you a fortune!

COLLIN
Well its not the cars fault. Its
these cut-throat parking people. I
never used to get tickets!

JANET
Dad perhaps its time to slow down
and take a break. Sell the car and
perhaps move into a nice rest home.

COLLIN
NO! I didn't work all my life and
fight the Jap's in the Pacific just
to be shuffled off to an asylum!

DAVE
Ah here we go, the great invasion!
You only joined up at the very end.
Dodging bottle caps and hoola girls
on the beach was the only action you
saw! Eh Pops.

Collin in getting in a rage shouts down at Dave.

COLLIN
Well I spent time in a POW camp in
the war, and I thought you of all
people could appreciate what its like
to be locked up. At least being a
soldier is far more honourable than robbing a few filthy little off
licenses!

DAVE
Look old man the sensible thing to do
for everyone, is move out into an old
folks home before you end up to your
neck in parking fines. We'll look after the house.

Dave finishes reasonably. Collin outraged stands up glowering down at Dave.

COLLIN
That's what this is really about!
You just want my house! I'll be
six feet under before I will let a
thieving fat yob get it!

Collin storms out slamming the front door behind him.

INT. RETIRED SERVICEMEN'S CLUB – DAY

The room is filled with war veterans sitting around tables enjoying pints of beer. Collin is sitting looking considerably more content with four others. He finishes telling the others about his visit to his daughters house.
COLLIN
... and now my Janet and that sod
Dave want my house!

One of the men BURT a thick set jovial man with a jolly red face and large grey sideburns comments on his predicament.

BURT
Sounds like your having a rough
time of it alright.

COLLIN
Yes I'm feed up with them all.
No respect.

BURT
What you want is some land mines
and razor wire in the front garden
that I'll keep the bastards out!

There is laughter around the table at the joke.

BURT
Actually come to think of it I know
a chap who has all that stuff. He's
a war memorabilia collector for people
that do the dog fights and mock battles
at some these air shows. He offered me
a job driving some of the old tanks.

COLLIN
Good oh. Well it would be a good way
to get the riot police out I guess.

BURT
Yes but if you want to do something different to get away from it all, we need more drivers. You would be doing what you did in the war but in mock
dog fights and battles.

COLLIN
Well its something to think about I
guess. But I would have to sell my
old house. I'm not giving it to Janet while she's still with that bloody
crook.
BURT
So you would be interested then?

EXT. COLLINS HOUSE - NIGHT

A black cab drops Collin off at his home. He is noticeably drunk as he staggers out of the cab after paying the driver. He walks past his car to see a large yellow wheel clamp on the front wheel. He kicks it viciously and curses out loud.

COLLIN
BASTARDS!

He heads inside and heads determined to the telephone. He dials and picks up the receiver.

COLLIN
Hello... Burt.

EXT. COLLINS HOUSE – DAY

Dave shuffles up the street towards Collins house. He has a cigarette dangling out to one side of his mouth and a football shirt on. He opens the front gate. There are sand bags and razor wire in the front garden. Dave glances around frowning and then trips halfway up the path to the door. He looks to find a trip wire down by his foot. Then there is a loud shrill noise as an air raid siren sounds from the roof. Collin appears round the side of the house in full battle fatigues from World War Two. He is carrying an old rifle with a bayonet on the end. He prods Dave gently with the bayonet.

COLLIN
Up! Get up off my lawn!

Dave struggles to his feet utterly surprised.

COLLIN
Hurry up! Its no wonder you got
caught thieving!

Dave gets to his feet and Collin sends him on his way with an army boot in the rear.

DAVE
You've lost your marbles Granddad!

COLLIN
You'll never get my house!

Dave hurries off down the street. With the air raid siren and commotion its not long before the neighbours appear on there front doors looking at Collin curious. An irate man across the street opens his window and yells at Collin.

MAN
Shut that racket off you potty
old fool!

INT. PYSCHIATRIC CLINIC - DAY

Dave and Janet are at a psychiatric specialists clinic, in Dr Sven Jensen's office. Dave is busy recounting his visit to Collins house to DR SVEN.
Dr Sven is a man in his fifties with blue eyes and grey receding hair. He has wire frame glasses on his face.
He nods at what Dave is saying.

DAVE
I tell ya Doc, he's gone mad as
a snake! He was fair stabbing me
with that bayonet!

Dave finishes and Dr Sven considers what Dave has said for a few moments. His voice is high pitched and reedy.

DR SVEN
Ah yes. Very traumatic. But do not
worry I will take care of your
father. I deal with these elderly
gents every day.

JANET
Please Doctor we just want a nice
home for him.

Dr Sven stands up and spreads his hands in a placating gesture.
DR SVEN
I understand completely. You
can put your trust in me, he will
get the best care available.
Dr Sven forces a cheesy smile at Dave and Janet.

EXT. TESCO'S SUPERMARKET – DAY

Collin is struggling out of a busy supermarket with some shopping when Dave pulls up at the entrance in his car, an old Volkswagen Golf.

DAVE
Granddad! Get in the car. I have
to take you to the hospital.

Collin taken aback by this narrows his eyes suspiciously.

COLLIN
What the bloody hell for?
I'm not going anywhere..

DAVE
Listen I haven't got time to
argue! Janet's been hurt. So get
in!

Collin hurrying throws the groceries in the back and jumps in. The car roars off.

EXT. CHERRY FARM – DAY

Dave's car quickly shuttles through the large ornate gates of Cherry Farm mental hospital. There are large green lawns and brick building's off the hospital with a few patients walking around outside the buildings.

INT. DAVE'S CAR – DAY

Collin sitting in the front seat beside Dave looks at the hospital with a frown.

COLLIN
This is a loony bin you twit.
Janet won't be here!

Dave pulls up at the entrance and toots the horn. Doctor Sven and a large burly orderly appear and approach the car.

DAVE
No... But you will be Granddad
from now on.

The orderly opens the car door and unbuckles Collin's seat belt. Doctor Sven hovers closely.

DR SVEN
Afternoon Mr Smith, my name is
Sven... please come with us.

The orderly grabs Collins arm and forcibly removes him from the car. Collin is alarmed.

COLLIN
Here just a minute!

He turns to Dave.

COLLIN
What the hell are you playing
at, you shit?

DAVE
Now now, Granddad! Enjoy yourself!
Looks like I will get your house
after all!

Dave revs the car and takes off.

EXT. COLLIN'S HOUSE - DAY

Burt walks down Collins street towards Collins house. His eyes narrow into a frown as he sees Dave and Janet outside loading a trailer with all of Collins furniture and belongings. Dave is struggling with a box just as Burt walks up to him..

BURT
Hello there Collin around?

Dave looks up from what he is doing annoyed at Burt.

DAVE
That old geezer is out of his
skull. So he's been put away.

Janet scowls at Dave and apologizes to Burt.

JANET
Sorry you will have to excuse
him, he's in a fowl mood. We have
decided that my Dad isn't coping
with living on his own.

Burt looks hard at Janet concerned at what has happened to Collin.
BURT
I'm surprised. Collin seemed pretty
good to me. So where is he living
now?

JANET
Um what's it called again Dave?
Something farm? Merry farm or
some such...

Burt appalled abruptly guesses the name.

BURT
Not Cherry Farm? That's a
terrible place for him. Its a
mental institution!

Burt hurries off down the street. Janet turns on Dave with an accusing expression.

INT. CHERRY FARM - DAY

Collin is sitting in a large lounge in front of a TV with other elderly and infirm people all wearing long white gowns. Collin glances out the window with a determined expression across his face.

EXT. BURT'S BACK YARD – DAY

Burt's back yard is overgrown with long grass and trees. It is also strewn with old World War Two paraphernalia. There is a large field gun, armoured cars, green ammunition crates and a large green tank. Beside the tank there are the four old veterans from the pub. They are getting tooled up for war. Getting dressed up in World War Two kit, adorning jackets and belts of ammunition.

Suddenly Burt strolls out of the back door of his house dressed in a sergeants uniform. He walks up to the group of men.

BURT
Alright men. Lets do this for
Collin.

One of the men nods curtly at Burt.

INT. CHERRY FARM LOUNGE – DAY

Collin is in the lounge with the other patients. Everyone is watching a War film with tanks and guns firing. There is the noise of tanks on the TV, but the noise begins to get louder. Collin looks around puzzled. There are some screams and exclamations. He looks around to see the veterans lead by Burt, burst through the door staggering unsteadily under the weight of there guns.
Collin jumps up in the commotion and greets the men.

COLLIN
Well done boys!

BURT
We couldn't let you rot away in
this place Collin.

COLLIN
We need to get that mug that put
me in here!

There is pandemonium as the patients are running riot. Jumping on beds and escaping from the hospital and heading out of the grounds. The orderlies are trying to get them into there rooms and lock them away. Three are dragging one large patient away. DR SVEN is walking around shocked at what is happening.
He spots Collin and the other veterans and orders his staff to challenge them.

DR SVEN
Get them. Get them!

Three large orderlies approach them. One of the veterans reaches round on his belt and produces a grenade. He throws it at the approaching orderlies. They leap aside screaming in terror. There is a loud bang but a small explosion and the room only fills with smoke.

BURT
(chuckling)
Good thing we remembered those
air show grenades.

COLLIN
Time we were off?

BURT
Yes we had better clear out before
the enemy regroups.

The war veterans head for the exit of the hospital. DR SVEN lifts himself off the floor with his head all covered in black soot from the grenade.

EXT. COLLINS HOUSE – DAY

Dave and Janet are still outside the front of Collins house with the loaded trailer. Janet is read faced and angry arguing with Dave.

JANET
Why didn't you tell me you put
him in a mental institution! Dad
doesn't need that!

DAVE
What?! I thought you were for it!
He's off his rocker anyway. No
better place for him.

JANET
For a retirement village! Not a
nut house!

DAVE
What does it matter? I've got the
house anyway. We can...

JANET
YOU'VE got the house! So you just
wanted it all along...

Janet is interrupted by the roar of a loud diesel engine, quickly getting louder. Dave and Janet turn to look up the street where the sound is coming from.
Suddenly various people from the neighbourhood appear around the corner running for there lives. Hooded teenagers and school pupils followed by an overweight and out of breath parking attendant.
Close behind the mob a large green World War 2 tank appears, slewing wildly on its tracks as it takes the corner. The tank comes to a stop in front of Janet and Dave. Collin climbs out of the tank wearing an army uniform and armed with an old rifle, followed by Burt.

COLLIN
So you thought you could have me
safely locked away did you? Well
listen here. You can clear off.

Collin digs the gun but into Dave's paunch who bends over gasping.

DAVE
You've lost the plot Granddad! I
only did it for Janet and the boys.

COLLIN
That's not what you told me!

JANET
Dad's right you only thought about
yourself. We were fine living where
we were.

COLLIN
Its alright luv. You and the boys
can have the house now as long as this bastard slings his hook. I have been selfish too. But I'm off to Wales to
help Burt with his air shows now.

Janet turns to Dave with a cold look.

JANET
Fine by me Dad.

Collin reverses the gun to show the bayonet. Dave straightens up with fear. Then runs off down the street. Collin climbs back into the hatch of the tank.

COLLIN
After him lads!

The tank roars off after Dave who is running as fast as he can.

CREDITS

ANDREW MACLEOD