Pumpernickel

Pumpernickel

“Sorry, we’re closed.”

“The sign says five o’clock, my watch says I have two minutes.”

“Your watch is slow.”

“We’re closed...” the woman said again, now starting to shut the door.

“Wait! I’ll make it worth your while! I only need one thing and I’ll leave a big tip!”

“What’s the thing?”

“A loaf of pumpernickel!”

The woman sighed and then opened the door a little wider. Judy rushed in and grabbed the bread then ran back to the door.

“That’s six dollars,” the woman said.

“Oh dear, I must have forgotten my wallet,” Judy said, grinning as she got outside the door, “And, here’s your tip, don’t trust people who offer you big tips for not being a jerk!”

The woman frowned, then shut the door.

As Judy stood there relishing the moment, a young man who had seen the encounter asked, “You actually have the money, don’t you.”

Judy looked at him, “Yes.”

“She just irritated you, am I right?”

“Yes. Would you like some of my pumpernickel bread?”

“Unfortunately I am about to get on a bus.”

“Really? Me too!”

“Really?”

“Hey, I wouldn’t be pulling that stunt on someone I would ever see again!”

The bus pulled up.

As the couple got seated, Judy looked up. There was that bakery woman walking by, squinting, with a seriously evil grin on her face. Judy jumped up and bolted off the bus.

The woman sat in her seat.

“Nice one, the young man said.

“I would have given her the bread if she wasn’t so rude.”

“I know you would have.”

“I hope it was enough.”

“She looked healthy, you can’t feed them all.”

“Thanks, and what can I make for you for dinner?”

“I’m actually in the mood for pumpernickel now!”

“You got it, Kiddo.”

“Thanks, Mom.”