Pie in the Face

It's one of the basics taught in 'Theatre'
Surrounded by comedy, Don't give way to laughter.

You're not yourself, but playing a part
Your reactions are scripted - not from your heart.

There's slapstick, there's wit all over the stage
You keep a poker face or forfeit your wage.

So young Peter, apparently full of grace
Had to look disapproving at pie in the face.

Those around him could giggle and guffaw
But Peter, he was playing the upholder of the law.

He had to catch the culprits, and lock them in jail
Placate the victims - (Not smirk as they told the tale).

"He did it on purpose, hit me with a pie."
Young Susie complained, beginning to cry.

The spotlight was on him, oh, this was tough
Pie in Susie's face! He wanted to LAUGH!

Suddenly he looked closer at Susie's bent back
She was shaking with sobs .. NO - what the heck!

This victim of the prank, who had 'faced' the worst
Actually found it funny and was giggling fit to burst.

"Oh, Peter," she gasped, "My face is hidden!
I can laugh all I want, but you must do as you're bidden!"

Peter frowned at her, because he did know
His Director was seated right in the front row.

He must NOT laugh or chuckle or smile
He must look angry all the while.

"Wasn't it funny, Peter," Susie whispered
"That squishy squashy pie on the Professor's beard?"

Peter could not help it, his lips began to twitch
Susie's pretend sobs grew higher in their pitch.

Suddenly, the boy broke down - the 'police' gave way
He threw back his head, he roared, standing, he did sway.

In the first row, the Director did frown
His most important actor had let him down.

When the reviews appeared, they were surprised to find
Far from criticising him, pundits were actually kind!

"The policeman's character was most humanly portrayed,
His natural change to laughter was very well played!"

So Peter was being praised, he wasn't in disgrace
Which shows anyone can laugh at Pie In the Face!