Why is Nobody Helping Me? WC:313

Why is Nobody Helping Me?

I am lying on the pavement outside Johansson’s Mini Mart. I have been mugged; my purse and most of the items in my shopping bag have been stolen. It happened so fast; he came up from behind.

He did leave a package of tampons and a bottle of bitter lemon I bought for a recipe I am making (not the tampons, the bitter lemon) if I ever get home.

Why is nobody helping me?

I have no wallet, but I do have a five dollar bill stuffed in the back pocket of my jeans. Unfortunately, that is not enough for an Uber.

I forgot to mention he stole my car; the person with the car keys gets the car.

Why is nobody helping me?

I also forgot to mention my glasses broke in the fall, so everything is blurry.

There is a tiny snowball next to my bloody ankle. I can't quite reach it from my prone position. Oh, silly, blind me, it is not a snowball, it's a ball of cotton. I bought a package of cotton balls; maybe it tore open when he was ripping it from my bag, and one skittered out.

Why is nobody helping me?

I have my cell phone, but it is smashed beyond recognition. It was dead already, but all it needed was a charge, not a coroner.

Before he decimated my Galaxy with his biker boot, he stole the SD card and the battery. I am wondering if this was more than a run-of-the-mill robbery. Hmmm?

Anyway, I have an empty cell phone with a shattered screen, so I cannot call an Uber.

Why is nobody helping me?

When the police finally arrive (if they ever do), I am afraid I will not be able to identify the bastard. However, I do know my license plate number…I think.

Anywho, enough about me. How’s your day going?