Pencils

Pencils

By E.A Valdez 10/11/2020

Maybe it was the rain, or that my dog finally stopped throwing up on my new carpet, but I felt lethargic, and philosophical at the same time. I still had so much work to do, but as I groaned up off the couch, I just wanted to lay back down. I grabbed my galaxy pencil out of my dog's mouth that dropped on the floor, relieved to only see a few chew marks. I have been thinking about what people always say to me, or ask me, or anything really. "So... no sex?" "Must be a boring life for your partner." "you don't like people?" "Impossible.". It becomes frustrating, but I think what is most frustrating is when Poppy (My pit bull) keeps stealing my pencils, pens, and all my writing utensils around the house. Oh, and by the way, in case you have not noticed, I am the feared asexual. I am the ace of the cards. Run, but you cannot hide! Ha-ha, all jokes aside, I have always been a little curious for a relationship, but when poppy looks at her with her dopey eyes, I forget about it. I mean, I love animals. I just wished animals loved me. Poppy was the first animal not to bite, scratch, die, or do anything to hurt my weak heart, and so forth I treat her like the queen she is. I wished Amy looked at me the way Poppy does. Amy is beautiful, cute, smart, cool, kind, friendly, trusting, trustful, and more. She is perfect... except she does not want me. I am fine though, Poppy loves me, right...? Never mind, she just barfed on my couch.... oh well I say after I clean it up and try to shake off the lethargy as I get ready for work. I keep putting it off, but I am going to have to kill Amy one day, and fast. Oh, I also forgot, I am a hired assassin. Hired to kill Amy. The most wanted criminal in the world.