About That...

“Let’s talk turkey. No not the bird. The proverbial turkey, the get at brass tacks kind. We both know you haven’t prepared for this eventuality. We both know I have. You want me to “help ya out.” I want a nice house in the country, a dog, and not to have to worry about money, ever. What do “ya” got for me?”
“You know what I have. You’ve tried to take it from me more than once. If I give you what you want, what guarantee do I have that you won’t turn around and rat me out to the IRS?”
“None, but if I don’t “help ya out,” the IRS will be the least of your problems.”
“Given, but I want insurance!”
“Fine, wipe down the knife!”
“Why?”
“You wipe down the knife and I will hold it and get my bloody fingerprints all over it! Then we’ll put it in this little baggie and you will keep it. If I rat you out you have evidence against me.”
“Sounds reasonable, I will give you what you want...”
“Remember I have the IRS info on you! Now let me get that wood chipper started.”