Baldy & Blizzard

"Alright, Team! The time has come! We have been overlooked long enough! Today is the day I make my push for Class A!"

"Yes, President!"

"Woooooo!"

"We believe in you, President Fubuki!"

"Hey, can you guys keep it down? I'm trying to watch Super Sentai Troopers."

Saitama rolled over to face them; it was a normal weekday and he was laying on his side in his own living room watching one of his favorite super hero programs on TV. He wore a simple pair of pajama bottoms but occupying the rest of the living room was the elegantly-dressed Fubuki, whom was holding a cramped meeting with the rest of the Blizzard Group. They had a whiteboard, markers, props and everything.

Eyelashes leapt up and faced him. "Now is not the time for TV! This is important! The president needs your help! And aren't you too old for kiddy shows?!"

"And put on a shirt!" Mountain Ape called out. "Nobody wants to see your nipples!" Saitama was indeed shirtless.

Fubuki addressed him. "Eyelashes, apologize. That is your vice president."

Eyelashes mumbled an apology.

Fubuki then rose her head to call on Saitama. "Now, Vice President Saitama. Do you have any suggestions on how to accomplish this?"

There was no answer.

"Because as the Blizzard Group's honorary Class A member, we could benefit from your insight."

Still there was no answer. In fact, Saitama laughed at a joke the Red Sentai Trooper made.

"Saitama!" Fubuki shouted.

"I've had it!" The tailor-suited brute Mountain Ape leapt right behind Saitama. "You've disrespected President Fubuki for the last time! Today is the day I put you in your place, Baldy! Enough!" He kneeled down, reached over Saitama to grab the remote control and turned off the TV.

Saitama immediately turned over and punched Mountain Ape lazily and sent him flying from the living room into the kitchen where he crashed into and became embedded in the refrigerator.

"Woaah!" Lily cried out as she and all the other barely managed to jump out of the way to dodge Mountain Ape's flying body.

A millisecond after the crash, Fubuki reached out and telekinetically forced Saitama down hard on his face with a telltale green aura enveloping them both.

"Until next time, Team!" Fubuki said to them for a farewell.

"Hai!" They said in unison meaning, yes. They bowed to her and orderly left the apartment.

"Should we really leave Ape behind?" asked Lily

"Ehh, he'll be fine" answered Eyelashes. "The President will care for him."

Afterwards, Fubuki went to the living room where Saitama was still lying flat on his face.

"Stop it. I know you aren't hurt."

Saitama rolled back onto his side facing her and propped himself on his elbow.

"Ah."

She kneeled down and hugged her knees beside him.

"You could be more considerate when our friends come over, you know. It wouldn't hurt to hear some input from you. We are together after all. And this is really important to me."

"Hmmm." He scratched his temple and looked down thoughtfully. She waited patiently on his answer. It was true that he was aloof most hours of the day but there were moments where he was actually profound and that was one of the reasons why she was with him.

"I'm hungry." He said, scratching his lean belly.

She fell from exasperation.

"Was that really the right time to say that?!" she said when she got up. "Huh?" He was already gone.

"We need to make groceries" she heard him say.

She followed him into the kitchen. "You're really downplaying this."

Their refrigerator was leaking liquids of multiple colors and was busted because Mountain was still unconscious inside of it. He twitched a few times.

"My juice."

*This is where the anime opening would play. I'm not writing a song or anything. Just saying.*

Saitama and Fubuki were both members of the Heroes' Association and also in a committed relationship. After the destruction of Saitama's old apartment in City Z, he had been invited to live in the Class A housing provided by the Association. Since, she was always at his place anyway he didn't see the harm in inviting her to live with him. Who he didn't invite were the others in the Blizzard Group and he often made that known; openly, though that was often ignored, but also passively at times.

His hero name was Caped Baldy, a name that he was not happy with but one that seemed to amuse the executives of the Association greatly. His rank was Class A, Rank 39. Though there were still doubters among the public as to his credentials, what couldn't be denied was the growing respect for him among the heroes themselves.

Her hero name was Hellish Blizzard, a name that spoke of her icy personality and insurmountable powers. Her rank was Class B, Rank 1 and for the longest time, she was proud of this fact. She was glad to have the number one rank in something regardless of the grade before but recently she had been inspired to reach for something more; Class A that is. It was an inspiration which she largely credited to Saitama though she wished he were more openly supportive about it.

The two of them were at the supermarket in the rice and grain aisle. She was dressed casually in jeans, a T-shirt, a wool shawl and flat slip-ons. He was wearing his full costume, cape and all.

"Do you expect us to run into trouble?"

"Do you mean overpriced sashimi?" he asked with a bit of panic in his voice.

"Never mind."

"If the price on mushrooms have dropped since the last time you have to let me know."

"Fine. Fine. Just calm down."

She picked out some noodles and looked them over. He tapped her shoulder and showed her a nameless brand that they could buy multiples of that would equal the value of the one she picked up. She smiled and took them from him with her telekinesis where she dropped them into their cart.

"We make a good team, don't we, Saitama?"

He beamed himself. "Heh. I guess we do."

"Good." Her smile turned cold. "So why is he here?"

Behind Saitama, Genos was looking at the back of some hair growth formula.

"Master, this product has a ninety percent success rate" the cyborg hero announced.

Saitama knocked it out of his hands. "Won't you give that a rest already?"

The group pushed two fully stocked carts towards the front of the market.

"Isn't it convenient that the Association repairs and upgrades appliances for free, Saitama?" Fubuki asked. "We won't have to buy a new one."

"Yeah" he answered, "but I wonder what they're going to do about that Hill Monkey guy."

"It's Mountain Ape and is it really okay that we left him there? I feel kinda bad."

"Ehh, he'll be fine. A hero should be tough. He'll thank us."

Back at their apartment, Association workers were moving in their highly advanced refrigerating unit into the kitchen on a dolly while others were attempting to remove the large unconscious man from the old refrigerator.

"He ... won't budge!" One of them groaned.

As they tugged on him, they noticed his eyes blinking open.

"Oh good! You're awake! Do you mind helping us, sir?"

He gripped the sides of the unit and attempted to leverage himself to his feet.

With another yank which combined with their own attempt, he was flung from the refrigerator and flew through the air where he landed on his face. He slid across the kitchen floor for a couple of feet and he rolled onto his back again. They saw that he had clearly lost consciousness.

All of the workers fell silent. Somebody cleared their throat.

"Well, at least we can switch the fridges now."

While waiting to check out, the three of them commented on the fact that all the lines were so long.

"Well, this a drag" Fubuki said. "I know we'll get there eventually but it's kind of irritating that some lanes are closed when they could easily cut down on lines."

"Maybe some employees are off today" Saitama answered, "and besides, that isn't our biggest problem."

Behind them, Genos was being swarmed by fans, mostly schoolgirls hounding him for autographs.

"Shouldn't you be in school?" Saitama shouted, though nobody listened.

It just so happened that a supervisor was walking by and saw Demon Cyborg himself signing autographs. He immediately did a double take.

"Demon Cyborg! You shouldn't be at the end of the line! Come with me immediately!" He rushed to the front of Genos' crowd and led him and his cart to a previously closed lane and opened it up. "I'll check you out myself! Don't consider it preferential treatment! Our supermarket loves to serve our customers!"

Some of the other registers noticed Genos as well.

"Hey, is that Demon Cyborg?"

"It is! It's Demon Cyborg!"

"Holy $#%!"

"He's so hot! I wonder if he likes blondes!"

The Store manager got on the intercom. "Ladies and gentlemen, we have a special guest among us. The S Class hero, Demon Cyborg! To celebrate this joyous occasion, we are activating a ten minute, half-off on everything super-sale! We love you, Demon Cyborg!"

"Well, I guess there are some perks to Genos after all, huh Saitama?" Fubuki asked him.

"Fubuki, wait here" he told her and he sped off so fast the wind jostled her hair and sent her shawl flying so that she had to catch it with her powers. "A super-sale! I can't believe it! So many things ...!"

He ran off to grab a bunch of things he meant to grab when they went on sale or that he had just thought of.

There were clamoring crowds then and even those not around Genos were happy and showing it at the sales. Somebody witnessing all of this wasn't happy however.

A man wrapped head to toe in a dark trenchcoat carrying a basket of energy drinks was fuming at the back of a line.

"Demon Cyborg?" he asked out loud to himself. "What makes him so hot? He's not sexy. He's not hotter than a newborn sun like me. These people wouldn't know hot and sexy if it spanked them. I'll show them. They'll see how sexy I am when I kick his butt right in front of their faces! I am the one who deserves fifty percent off super-sales! They'll make it an hour when they get a load of me! Because I'm the star of the show! I'm the hottest thing around!"

The customers in front of him scooted away. "That weirdo is talking to himself."

"Don't be so loud. He might notice us."

"I'm Killer Star!" He flung the trench coat off his body and posed with his hands reaching for the ceiling. His form was revealed as a buff, tanned dude in a violet speedo with blue star designs on it. He carried a butter knife in his right hand but that was only for his rivals. His real claim to glory was that his face was a three by three foot bright yellow star with little black dots and a smiley face for eyes and a mouth. He was a monster and had the appearance of somebody who begged for attention but even in his magnificent pose, everybody's attention was on the hero Demon Cyborg.

"Peasants!" he shouted when he saw the crowds flocking to the undeserving hero. "I'll show them real star power!"

Fubuki was moving her cart closer to the front of the line while some of those in front of her abandoned their spots to see Genos. She was just minding her business so she didn't notice the bright cones of light flashing down on people to her right. She looked down at her cart.

"I wonder if Saitama will bring any steak."

"I'm Killer Star! I'm Killer Star! I'm Killer Star!" Each time he said his name, a concentrated cone of light bathed down on him from above, dazing and disoriented all those in his immediate area. He did this all the way to Genos.

He finally stopped before him.

"A monster?" Genos asked, taking up a fighting stance.

"A monster?" a pedestrian repeated as others noticed as well. The crowd began to panic and some ran. A bouncing yellow star blasted the floor in front of them to cut them off, sending tiles and debris into the air. Killer Star had flicked his butter knife towards the spot to send it there. He smiled, obviously impressed with himself.

Fubuki took notice then. "Damn. Where is Saitama?"

There are too many people here for me to go all out, Genos thought. I need to be careful. I can't disgrace myself in front of Master again.

"Demon Cyborg" Killer Star murmured, waving his knife around. "You'd better thank your lucky stars for you stand in the presence of a god! I'll bathe you in eternal light and disgrace you in front of all your adoring fans!"

"This is between you and me, monster" he said, stirring the engine inside of himself. "Let these people go."

Killer Star laughed. "No way! They're my audience! I'm the star of this show and after I destroy you, you'll be nothing to them! I am Killer Star! I was once a beautiful actor slash model starring in all of the feature films and gracing all of the magazine covers. But I faded away thanks to that fraud Sweet Mask! I wanted so very much to be a star again so I wished on one. A flying star! Now, I'm brighter than everyone else! I'll destroy that fake, Sweet Mask in front of the entire world! But you come first!"

Genos shook his head. "That was much too long. Shorten it to twenty words or less next time."

He leapt into the air above everybody's heads and used rocket propulsion blasting from his elbows to power a dive kick right to the monster's starry face. The impact caused a minor explosion that people ran from and bounced Genos high up in the air.

Genos looked down and saw that he was unaffected. Killer Star raised his knife and fired a large flying star made up of compacted metal, gas and light that Genos barely managed to dodge in mid-air.

"Ah, so you're a bit lucky too!" Killer Star exclaimed.

The pedestrians formed a sort of wide circle around the combatants and began cheering Genos on.

"Go, Demon Cyborg!"

"Make that monster regret it!"

"I love you so much, Demon Cyborg! Don't lose!"

"Everybody! Keep a safe distance!" Genos said to them all. No. I'll just have to take the fight away from them.

He propelled to the ground and grabbed Killer Star by the waist.

"What is this?" the monster demanded to know. "Whatever you're trying, it won't work!"

Genos took flight while holding Killer Star close to his body. It created a draft of dust and wind that caused people to shield their eyes. He flew the two of them right through the roof of the store and much higher than even above that. Once they were clear, Genos spun them around and shoved Killer Star away with a double legged kick. He was sent in a downward angled trajectory into the street well away from the store. Genos propelled himself to him just as he was standing.

He started his attack. He kicked him multiple times in his metallic, heated face with a jet-boosted, spinning roundhouse kick. Killer Star swayed a bit but he didn't seem all that affected. He was still airborne when he transitioned into one of his trademark attacks.

"Machiiiine Guuun Blows!" His fists rained down on Killer Star's face so fast that they weren't visible outside of sparks and fire. The number of times Genos hit him was quickly rising above one hundred very quickly. The impact was enough to push Killer Star through the pavement to his thighs.

"Killer Star!" A wide beam of intense light shot down from the clouds and enveloped them both.

"Tch!" Genos leapt away just as the light began to cover him. Most of his hair and clothes caught fire and burned away, revealing his cybernetic body underneath, which was red-hot from the heat.

When the light dissipated over Killer Star, he stepped out of his hole in the ground.

"Under the open sky, my power is increased tenfold!" Killer Star shouted up at him. "The universe truly smiles upon the great! I'm the star of the show, even without your audience!"

Genos's cybernetic eyes focused on him; his glowing false irises rotated. "I need to find a weakness quickly. His face seems impervious. His body? Isn't it that of a man? It does seem to withstand his light but ... it's better to attack that than wait to become prey!"

Genos sent a stream of fire at him and just as he suspected, Killer Star placed his face in the way. He jettisoned all around and tried the same method of concentrated fire. Each time, Killer Star managed to guard it with his face. Genos waited until he found an opening and veered straight for his body.

"Killer Star!" Another blast of light came down from the sky and nearly incinerated Genos only he shot away in time again.

I can't approach him, Genos lamented. He's tougher than I realized. His destructive capabilities ... if the Association knew of him, he may be considered a Dragon-Level Disaster.

"Stumped? You can't beat me so you may as well ... let me kill you!" He surged into the air after Genos, which Genos barely managed to dodge with his jet boosters.

"He can fly as well?" Genos had to wonder as the monster stopped in mid-air and turned to veer for Genos again. Again, Genos avoided him. They had this dance for a while, consisting of Killer Star zipping for the hero and Genos avoiding him. It was during this that Genos came to a realization.

He can only fly in a straight line. And he even struggles to stop. I could possibly use this.

So he did. At one point, he allowed Killer Star to fly in behind him. Just so he could release upon him a mass of adhesive gel. Killer Star immediately fell from the sky and became stuck to the ground.

"Euuuugh! Gaaagh!" Killer Star kicked his arms and legs as he struggled within the bulbous, malleable fluid/solid gel. "What a dirty trick."

"Now, you're mine!" Genos prepared to incinerate him as multiple cannons protruded from his biceps and forearms. "INCINERATE!"

He fired a downward stream of overwhelming thermal power that would conceivably scorch most beings alive. Still, Genos felt a presence behind him. Strong, bandy arms wrapped his body.

"Got ya!" Killer Star shouted in his ear with smiley face. "Killer Star!"

A beam washed over them both and Genos could feel his metal shell burning away.

"Killer Star! Killer Star!" He repeated his name over and over to shower them both in more light. Eventually, he let Genos fall to the ground. The hero bounced off of the pavement; he was both limbless and had his metallic spine exposed.

"Look at you now!" Killer Star yelled as he dropped to the ground. "Thanks for that! My body was unaffected by your blast but you did manage to burn away that sticky stuff you shot on me so I could sneak behind you! Now is my chance to finish you. Ah, look at that!" He had turned to see a crowd of people coming out of the supermarket to watch. "Our audience."

"Demon Cyborg! No!" one girl cried out.

"Demon Cyborg!"

Genos' head swiveled towards them. "No ... go back inside ... it's ... safe ..."

"Now, they'll all see ... what?!" Killer Star began to rise into the air involuntarily. He flailed his arms and legs in the air frantically as if he was trying to swim away. "What's going on?"

Fubuki and Saitama were floating high above the supermarket, enveloped in her green energy. It was she that was controlling his body with her telekinesis.

"I've seen enough out of you, creep!" she shouted at him. "You're a risk to human life and I can't sit back and watch it anymore!"

"Who is that?" somebody from the crowd asked another.

"I don't know but she's helping Demon Cyborg and she has powers!"

"So cool!"

Killer Star stopped squirming. "You think you can hold me? Think again!" He shouted his name and the intense light produced made her look away and break her hold over him.

She shrieked and Saitama leapt onto her; he shielded her with his body and cape.

"I'll kill you!" Killer Star began flying up and through them, only to bounce off and fall back to the ground. "Think you're tough, huh?" he said with a smile. "I'll fix that!"

He flew back up again and began hitting them over and over again from all sides, making arcs of sparking energy in the air. He continuously struck the two of them from all angles though they didn't move in return.

The people below cried out.

"She's done for, isn't she?"

"Oh, no!"

"No way can she hold up!"

Fubuki shifted against Saitama's chest.

"Why don't you just finish him?" she asked him.

"Hmm?" he looked down at her.

"You should just get rid of him." She said in melancholic voice. "I know you can do it easily. He's too powerful for me. I'll never be as strong as you and my sister. I'm not worthy of Class A."

"Fubuki ... I can't fly ..."

"So? You can jump much higher than I can fly anyway ..."

"... But we're flying right now, aren't we?"

She became agitated and looked at his face. "Now is not the time for you to be an airhead! I know you can get rid of him so just get rid of him already!"

"Fubuki, look around. We're still flying."

"Huh?" She did. They were high in the air and flashes were dancing around them just out of reach. The flashes were Killer Star bouncing off of them. He wasn't reaching them because they were still enveloped in the green sphere of telekinetic energy she produced.

"Your shield is holding up" he said to her, causing her to look at him. He smiled. "You're protecting both of us. You are strong."

"Saitama ..."

"Who cares about that class stuff anyway? We're heroes, right?"

She lowered her face against his chest again and nodded.

"Enough!" Killer Star went below them and shouted his name. Again, a stream of light rained down on them and onto him as well. When the beam dissipated however, they weren't there.

"Looking for us?!" Fubuki shouted from twenty yards away in the street with Saitama was at her side.

"Gah!" He shouted and began flicking his butter knife in their direction, sending giant stars of energy their way.

Saitama punched most of them while Fubuki split others apart with her powers. Each one they got split into dozens of smaller, harmless stars.

"Urghk!" He grunted. "I'm tire of you, woman! You are the worst costar! And no baldies!"

"Hey!"

He screamed and began flexing his muscles. His star face grew larger and brighter. His muscles and veins began to protrude and grow more prominent before his speedo burned away. Fortunately, he became covered in a bright yellow-blue flame to cover this up.

"Shooting Star Curtain Fall! Ah!" He shot high up into the sky, into the upper levels of the atmosphere. They could only see a yellow dot in the sky that resembled a star afterwards.

The crowd was murmuring in his wake.

"What happened?" one man asked. "Did he leave?"

"What's he doing?" Fubuki asked.

Saitama raised a hand over his eyes and peered up. "Oh, he's coming back down."

"What?! He is?" She looked up and the yellow dot was getting bigger. A low whistle seemed to accompany it. "God, he is!"

"It'll be fine." Saitama had stepped away from and began stretching his arms, back, neck and legs.

"You're being nonchalant again!" she looked at the crowd. "The people! They'll be hurt!" The whistle grew louder. She turned to them. "You have to get out of here!"

"Fubuki!" Saitama called to her. "That move you used on Silo ..."

"S-Silo? Do you mean Psykos?"

"...And Inugami ..."

"Tatsumaki!"

"Yeah, well that move. You should use it again."

She looked up and the star descended more and more. The whistle grew shriller. "Really?"

"Do you trust me?"

"I-I guess ..."

"Use that spinny move around you, alright? And close your eyes."

"Okaaaay." She closed her eyes. "I really don-"

He grabbed her by the shoulder and flung her into the air towards the falling star. She flew hundreds of feet into the air, screaming at the top of her lungs.

"Saaaiiiitaaaaamaaaaa! Youuuuu assssshooooole!"

She saw the bright light before her and screamed with all of her might as she activated her esper maneuver, her Psychic Whirlwind, which was a powerful swirl of esper energy which resembled a green hurricane. It was normally a devastating maneuver but she didn't see how well it would do against a monster falling like a comet. She closed her eyes and hoped for the best.

Well before they met in the sky, Saitama leapt into the path of Killer Star and withstood his impact. Killer Star was stopped in his tracks and this resulted in a great explosion. Then Fubuki flew into them both with her psychic whirlwind and flung them all around in a cyclone of bright, chemical fire.

The people blow saw the great fire in the sky from below and covered their eyes.

"Ah!"

They witnessed Saitama cradling Fubuki in his arms as they fell towards the ground, their descent slowed by her esper abilities. His half-burnt cape flowed beneath and behind him. They erupt into cheers as Saitama stepped safely to the pavement and lowered Fubuki so that she could stand on her own beside him.

Saitama looked to her. "See that? They're cheering for you."

She looked right back at him. "Saitama ..."

"Master ..."

Saitama looked over to see the limbless Genos being carried by Doctor Kuseno-created transporter bots.

"Oh, Genos." He went over to him.

"Yet again, I'm off to be repaired by the doctor. I've failed. You must be so disappointed in me, Master."

Saitama rubbed his temple. "Well, actually ..."

"Tell me, master. Nothing has worked. I continue to fail. How can I be great? How can I be a hero like you?"

"Well, Genos ... that's the thing. You already are great."

"Huh?"

"When that monster tried to cause problems, you took the fight away from those people. You put their safety before some stupid thing like popularity. Keeping people safe. That's what real heroes do."

"What ... real heroes ... do? I should write this down." His eyes shifted left to right and he swiveled his head. He remembered that he didn't have arms. "Oh ... right." He slumped within the grasp of the bots.

Saitama chuckled and gave him a thumbs up.

"Master! Behind you!"

Saitama turned around and saw that Killer Star was walking towards them in a weakened state. He seemed weary; His arms dragged at his sides and his butterknife skidded off of the ground. He had returned to his original size.

The crowd cried out at the sight of him, though they mostly focused on the fact that his speedo had burned off rather than that he was still alive.

A woman called out. "Pervert!"

A mother covered her daughter's eyes.

"Saitama!" Fubuki called out to him.

"Found ... you" Killer Star muttered. "Think ... you can get rid of me ... that easy. Not ... Likely." He stopped before them and leaned back. "Killer S-"

Saitama rushed in and punched him in the center of his starry face. His face grew bright white and his whole body blew apart. Rather than gore, a steady flow of white energy shot up into the air and created a fountain of star-shaped dust particles.

The crowd moved out towards and looked up in wonder as the dust fluttered all over them. Kids and parents reached out and touched it in with their hands. A child brushed it out of his hair and complained that it tickled. The light faded but the sparkling dust remained.

Fubuki went over to Saitama and he looked back at her.

"Well, welcome to Class A."

She gave a grateful smile.

Later, they sat at the computer they shared in their apartment. She gasped and stared at it with her mouth hanging open.

"Well, nevermind what I said" he told her. "Let's just remember that it's the people that count."

They were looking at the news story about the starry-faced monster and the one who put him down.

"They gave Genos all the credit!" she shouted. "And he moved up a spot in S-Class! We're not even mentioned!"

He lowered his head and conceded. "Welcome to my world. Well, look on the bright side." He went to the kitchen and stepped over Mountain Ape on the way. "At least we got a new fridge." He opened their new futuristic fridge and found that it was empty. "But we never got to buy our groceries. What a waste."

She bent down to see to Mountain Ape. "Shouldn't we do something about him?"

"He's injured. We shouldn't move him. Something could be broken. I saw it on TV once."

"Really? That doesn't right ..."

"Yeah. When he wakes up, we can ask him then if something is wrong. We should order something. What do you want to eat?"

"Oh, ummm ..." She stepped over Mountain Ape as well and they let him be while they looked for something to have for dinner.

Even Later than that, Mountain Ape finally began to stir on the kitchen floor.

"Uggh" He groaned as he rubbed his head. "Where am I?" He heard footsteps approach.

"Is somebody there?" Fubuki called out. The lights were out so she couldn't see him. "This entire complex is full of class A heroes so you picked the wrong place to rob!"

He recognized her voice. "Miss President?"

"Oh, Mountain Ape! You're finally up! Phew! I was so worried!"

"I'm so sorry you have to put up with me but I'm so glad to hear your voice."

She laughed. "Hold on. Allow me to turn on the lights." She flicked them on.

He was practically blinded since his eyes were unadjusted. He rubbed his eyes.

"Are you okay?"

"Oh, yes ma'am. It's just the light. My eyes just have to adjust. I should be fine."

"Do you feel alright?"

"Yes, President Fubuki. I really am well."

"Good. I'm glad to hear it. Would you like some water?"

"I wouldn't want to trouble you, Miss President."

"It's no trouble."

He heard her move to the sink and turn on the running water from the faucet while he blinked and began to regain his vision. She approached him and crouched down to hand him the glass.

"Here you go."

His vision rapidly cleared as he looked up at her. "Thank you, Mi- mi-mi-mi-" the first thing that came into view was her squished cleavage. His eyes grew comically large and he continued to stutter. She wore a black, partially see-though negilgee over solid black lingerie ensemble.

He continued stuttering as he scurried backwards from her. She stood up, confused and put the water on the counter. She absentmindedly gave him a full view of her veiled but nonetheless, half-naked body.

"Ape?"

His eyes rolled to the back of his head and he began convulsing and slobbering where he laid. "That ... bastard makes ... her dress ... like ... thaaaaat ..." his head lolled to the side. He fell unconscious again with his eyes open that time.

She turned around and called out. "Saitama! He really isn't okay! We really should call a paramedic! Saitama! Are you listening to me! Saitama!"