Four Poems

Spitting Feathers

How many poor birds must die
to satisfy Captain Birdseye;
but I'll bet you'd see him cry
if they baked his cock in a chicken pie.


The Amazon Worker's Lament

I often wonder when I die
and go to the warehouse in the sky,
in Amazon heaven will there still be
surveillance cameras trained on me?


Rotten

I don't wanna be like Johnny Rotten,
buttered crumpets best forgotten,
"How'yer doin' Farmer's Wife?"
Peirs Morgan? Get a Life.


Alfresco Breakfast

You tell me it was just a game,
but won't say who's the winner.
I doubt that we'll do that again,
well, not til after dinner.