Where it all started

Feeling my tears fall really fast,
As I close my eyes I’m back in the past
Trying to figure out where I went wrong,
How did I manage to stay this strong?

My first day at high school,
I didn't want to make myself look like a fool.
I walked through the gate,
Not even a minute late.

I’ve never felt so excited,
It brightened my day I felt delighted.
Time will quickly pass,
I’m now in my first class.

The teacher introduced me as the new girl
"Come to the front and give us a twirl"
The other girls sat in a team,
The things they said were really mean.

They called me a dirty slaggy trampy whore,
Threw me up against the class room door.
They called me every name under the sun,
But they said it didn't mean anything it was just for fun.

They didn't care how it made me feel
To them it was no big deal
They would say it’s only a game
And i should feel lucky with all this fame

They would throw things at me,
Put my uniform in the showers after P.E
They would smash my head off of bricks
Throw me to the floor followed by kicks

They would put food in my hair
And if anyone asked it was just a dare
They would rip my shirt,
and take the piss out of me because I wore a skirt

My whole life came to a halt,
as I look in the mirror and think it’s my fault.
I tried to get help to stop the pain
But the teacher wouldn't let me explain

When i tried to tell the teacher
I got called an awful creature
For making it up, I got all the blame
I’ve never felt so much shame

I’ve never seen a teacher act so calm,
She said I remind her of an animal who lives on a farm
I had to do something before those girls did serious harm
So I set off the fire alarm

I never got suspended,
I couldn't wait until the week had ended
I tried everything to make it stop,
But I still feel my tears drop.

It didn't stop at the end of the school day
they would get on the bus and take my shoes away.
They would put chewing gum in my hair
whack my head off of the bus chair

I Was living in a nightmare.
life was really unfair
They would throw me up against a van
Kick the shit out of me because they can

but It didn't end there,
It followed me everywhere.
I thought I would be safe at home,
but it made me feel alone.

The front door would knock,
my mom would open it, and I stand in shock.
My heart starts racing,
Nobody knows what I’m really facing

One girl asked if I can sleep at her house
I don’t say a word, I’m as quiet as a mouse.
I told my mom I didn't want to stay
She said “don’t be rude go out and play”.

It will do you good to have some friends
my nightmare never ends.
There was nothing I could do to make it disappear
From that point onwards I lived in fear

I fell asleep on her bed,
The other girls whack me around the head
"Wake up its time to play"
Then they would take all my clothes away.

They would stand there, point and laugh
taking a photograph
I would tell them to Leave me alone,
I begged For them to let me go home

When this all started I was only eleven
Already wishing to go to heaven
I put up with this for years
And I’ve cried so many tears

What I’d do for just one wish
What have I done to deserve all this.
This is where it all started
when I first became broken hearted.