Goodbye

Through the mist you call me
I hear your echoed voice.
I cannot find you.
You are gone.
Although your body stays,
I lost your mind and soul.
Seeing you like this
is more than I can bear.
So I shut you out
when you need me most.
I shut off
when you reach out.
I can't be the one
to make you whole.
I'm broken, in part because of you.
You did not mean it
it was not your fault.
It was a fault of some
genetic code, maybe.
PTSD, maybe, the result of
a troubled past.
Fear, stress, abuse, who knows
what pushed you past the line
the line I seem so close
to sometimes.
You want to be normal,
but I can't make you that way.
I can try to show
you reason, but you
will not listen to me.
You need help, but
only you can make
that choice.
I have done so much,
too much.
I have lost so much,
to bring you back
but now, I have to
let you go.
Words cannot express
my sorrow. To wave
goodbye. To hope that
maybe, if I really try, I can save you.
I see you drowning,
but I can't swim.
No one else seems to
care. If I jump in
I'll just drown too.
Should I? I can't.
Other people need me.
I need me. Maybe
I'm selfish, but I
can't let you drag me down.
I can't drown with you.
I'm sorry.
I have to say goodbye.