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Rated: E · Monologue · Emotional · #2146929
A conversation between my Demons and I
I sit in this desolate house.
Realizing we made a mess of this.
In the silence i can hear the voices of my demons. They seem to just resonate. And reverberate.
It's all your fault. Your the one to blame. Your the one for this current situation, so now your alone through these stipulations, and manipulations. So as you sit here alone we want you to realize, hey wait your not alone, you have us. You'll always have us and no one else. We are jealous and will destroy every relationship you ever have just so the only voice you hear is ours.
Me: But why would you do that to me, being that your apart of me don't you want me to be happy. Don't you want me to experience love, kindness, and caring from other people. You know the feelings that everyone longs and wishes to experience at least once in this thing we call life. If we don't experience these what's the point in continuing down this path of life.
DEMONS: We do want you to experience those things, but then we want you to lose them. The losing of those makes us stronger with every loss of those feelings. And with each hurt we take more and more control until there is nothing but is.
Me: Well tell me this then, how do you plan on running each and every one of my relationships, because I don't think you can ruin every one of them. Now that I know your plan especially. Now I can try and stop you.
DEMONS: We won't give it all away, just tell you what we have already done. When your mom took her own life we told you that it was your fault. We told you she did it so she wouldn't have to deal with you, that it was the only way she could leave you. And that was the beginning of your believing everyone was going to leave you. Then all through elementary school we made you think the people that cared for you didnt want you. So you moved from Florida to Georgia, back to Florida back to Georgia. Over and over again in an attempt to find love, it was there you just couldn't see it bc we wouldn't let you. So you are a very smart person, and you made us work, you made straight A’s without even studying. And can do anything well that you put your mind to. But we always tell you that it's not good enough, that you could do better. Then made you believe everyone else felt the same way. So with every constructive criticism you received, made you just want to quit bc it wasn't good enough and never would be. We are tired of talking for now, and you have a lot to think about. So when you have made peace with this we will be back and tell you more, so we can ruin your consciousness a little more. Push you even closer to that edge, the edge of us taking control.
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