(are we) Guarded

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I scare myself

(she said to herself)

when I think too deeply, denying the walls and encumbrances held dear so long
to open the doors wide, dust the corners, and drag feathers over fine china–
darling–you are the only thing precious enough that I might
worry for breaking us if we continue to mishandle what is too fragile for words
and your heart–I was close to getting my claws into–seems guarded now–the castle
watched by half a dozen guards and their dogs, and you, well I believe you want me
more than ever but you will not tell me

So I scare myself

(she says to him)

half to death, no conveyance adequate to pass over to you the depth and lightness of my soul, and this one thing I want more than any, that I would claw you for it, scratch your eyes until they are useless for it (and she, her dark memory, her something that is yours that will remain yours) but I will be happy if I only see that spark there in your eyes–if I hear you say sweetheart once more–and I will believe you because you are there for only me–until you are not

(her glass is half full)