Morale and Men

I blink blankly at the rugged unfinished wall ahead of me. I sit there staring at it like a duck, doing nothing. My arms and legs are smeared with dark grease and dirt. The Hem of shirt is battered and my right arm bears scratches like those from a fang. I screw my face desperately and rise slowly turning around with the guilt clutching my heart firmly. I let out a scream, that arises from the bottom of my gut but I myself could not hear my voice. I trembled, and tried again and again, but all in vain. Suddenly my thoughts were screened on the rugged wall, My dad picking me up when I was a nine month old baby, I realize suddenly that this was probably the first time he ever picked me in his arms after I was born. Then came the scenes where I liked my dad more just because he was my dad. Then came the times when my mom and dad quarrelled endlessly, after which shortly I saw my dad leaving us.Then came the second disappointment,My younger brother once a sweet and innocent guy becoming a a victim of adolescence and going far u away from us. He was delicate yet valiant but I saw him back down. He suffered a lot sir to my parent's quarrel although I used to I put my life and limb to bring them together. Then the scene shifted, I could see myself -my younger self running after a boy the same age as myself. Pictures zoomed in showing me and my cousin smiling widely . And time went on and in a second it screened my older self looking pathetically at the same boy, now astonishingly tall with broad shoulders and all. I pitied myself and I felt a great rush inside me that I badly wanted to slap my older self for fancying him. Then came my friend to whom I was far away from. He seemed to be a mystery unsolved yet resolute in his words and carried himself like a real man. The quality which none of the men in my life possessed. I beamed with pride, happy to have this guy in my life, to stand guard for himself and for the people he loved, for he was true at heart and tucked with love.