Behind a Monitor

“Binary here, just chillin’ with the fam. Lolol, just kitten. I’m programming the new game again!” I mouthed the words as I typed. With my nose, I nudged the computer mouse (which sadly was not a real mouse) over to the post button and pressed it, posting my “Meow” onto NekoSpace, for my entire two followers to see. Technically, there were only three users on the website, but that doesn’t matter. Last year, I created the social media site, but it never became popular. A shrill mew let me know my dad responded to my post.
“Get back to work Binary.” my dad, Calibri responded. What a party pooper. Calibri is always like this, gruff and annoyed by almost everything, but you can tell he really cares. Even if he is a furball about it. But I hadn’t slept in three days due to all the programming I had to do, and would rather play around on NekoSpace, then program more.
My mom, Helvetica, who was painfully out of the times, turned around to talk to me instead of responding online.
“Binary sweetie, you’ve been sleeping all day. Tori and Jay would be upset to know you’ve wasted another day.” Helvetica warned in her sweet innocent voice. Or had I not slept in three hours? I honestly can’t tell.
Turning around, I saw my parents, Helvetica and Calibri, the other two members on NekoSpace, typing on the keyboards. Each of their paws, even their hind legs, danced on the keyboard, as they blogged about the game that I programmed alone.
With a smile on my face, I turned back to my computer, closed out of NekoSpace, and opened up the programming program my owners gave to me. Helvetica, Calibri, and I are a loving family of cats, who program and promote games. Our owners, Jay and Tori, own a huge company that produces games. They manage and tell us what to do, and reward us with extra affection and love. We alone do the work of an entire company, which is unknown to the public. It might seem like slavery or animal cruelty, but it really isn’t. When I was born, Jay and Tori realized my odd talent of using computers and decided to see if Calibri and Helvetica had it too. Turned out, we were all superhuman cats with expert knowledge at using computers. They always wanted to open up a game company, but never had the skillset to do so. Now, the three of us, are blessed with the opportunity to live a meaningful life and make our owners happy. Though it’s tiring and lonely, I don’t think any of us would give it up for the world.
I looked over at my sweet bed longingly, my ginger tabby fur glowing in moonlight coming from the window, but sadly I could not sleep. After all, there was a chance I had spent the entire day sleeping. But also another that I hadn’t slept in three days. I was still confused as ever about that.
I could still hear the tapping of the keys as my mom and dad worked away. Their job was to promote the game, talk with people about the game, and answer any questions. It was my job to program the game, all by myself. It was a stressful job, but a fun one, working with my family as well as my owners. I took a sip of my coffee, which was now cold, and waited for the program to load.
A bright light illuminated the room as the program opened, and a screen of 0’s and 1’s appeared.
“Hmmm… where should I start?” I mumbled involuntarily. After many years of solitary computer work, I picked up a habit of talking to myself. My parents are used to it now, yet they still find it somewhat annoying. Either way, it helps me concentrate.
Before actually working, I began messing around on the program. I looked at the history page, a part where it told me when I logged in and when I logged out. Strangely enough, an unknown person had logged in while I was sleeping, or wasn’t, sleeping.
“Hey Mom, Dad! Were you guys checking out the coding while I was asleep?” I asked them, barely worried. Misconceptions happened a lot, the unknown login was probably my parents or my owners. But I still can’t figure out why the login is classified as “unknown”
“I sure wasn’t Lil B. I was busy updating the fans about your new demo.” Helvetica answered in her sweet voice, without looking up from her work. I turned to my dad, wondering if he had logged in.
“I don’t care enough in the first place to login.” Calibri gruffly stated. I guess it’s his own “unique” way of expressing his love. I swished my tail in confusion. Had it been Tori or Jay that signed in. It would have told me that it was them who logged in, not an unknown person.
Tori, the female owner, was in charge of my parent’s work, she managed the updates and promotions they wrote. Jay, the husband of Tori, owned the company, and was my personal boss. He taught me how to code and program when I was still a kitten. Jay rarely signed in to check on his work, he usually checked in person, watching me from behind as I danced on the computer, typing out code. Jay probably accessed the program from a different computer than normal, that was all.
About an hour later, the door creaked open, and my owners stepped through, blatantly exhausted from their day at work. While they may seem lazy, having their pets do a lot of work for the company, Jay and Tori really worked hard for the games we produced. Jay, Tori, Helvetica, Calibri, and I are all one big family.
Helvetica meowed in delight at their arrival, but did not look up from her screen or stop working. Calibri did not even acknowledge their return at all.
How boring. I leaped off my desk and stalked over to Jay and Tori, brushing my head against Jay’s leg. He reached down to stroke my head, and Tori handed Calibri and Helvetica a bowl of cat food each. I sighed. If I want to have any fun here, I have to make the fun myself. Jay pulled a big juicy mackerel out of his lunch cooler, and split the fish in half with his bare hands. He tossed the bigger half to me, and ate the other one. Tori looked disgusted at his behavior and yelled something I couldn’t understand. I was fluent in eighteen languages, but I never picked up the one that Jay and Tori spoke. Perhaps I should learn one day.
After I was given enough attention, I meowed and stalked back to my computer, signaling for Jay to follow. Confused, he followed me and looked at my computer screen. Leaning even closer, he stared at the login in bewilderment and shook his head.
I pricked my ears in shock. That wasn’t the reaction I anticipated. Was the login not Jay? If not, who could it have been? Jay covered his head in his hands and groaned. Worried, Tori strided over, and my parents looked back too. Tori gasped as she read the words and yelled something at Jay. Now a little concerned, I traced the IP of the unknown user.
“France?” I muttered in confusion. I didn’t know anyone on the company’s outside staff who lived in France. Curiously, I looked up at Jay, expecting an explanation. Maybe a staff member had taken a business trip to France and wanted to check in. Though I always thought that only my parents, Jay, and Tori were able to access the program. That is, besides me. Jay opened up a word document, so that he wouldn’t ruin the code, and typed a word in binary, the only language they both shared. He wrote the word “hacker”.
Lashing my tail in anger, I clicked onto the program where all the game code was, desperately searching to see if my hard work was still there. In the place where my blood, sweat, and tears of the past year should be, was a picture of a small brown dog, rolled over onto its back. I moved the picture to thankfully see all my precious coding behind it, and deleted the cute photo.
Jay slammed his fist on the table, spilling my bitter caffeinated drink, and walked out the door, Tori following right behind him. I stared after them in bewilderment, my parents doing the same, speechless.
I, as usual, was the one to break the silence. “Maybe he didn’t eat enough fish.” I suggested with amusement in my eyes.
“Quit screwing around Binary.” Calibri demanded.
“Aww, I can’t have a little fun.” I fake whined. Mom and Dad leaped off their desks and onto mine to examine the commotion.
“Can you press the undo button Lil B?” Helvetica asked. I did, and the picture of the cute puppy appeared again.
“What did I say about getting back to work?! What’s that ugly mutt doing there?” Calibri irritatedly questioned.
“How scary. Chill out, dad, it wasn’t me. If anything I would have uploaded a picture of a ferret.” I joked, fueling my dad’s anger. I turned back to inspect the photo, wondering who could have put it there when a thought stuck me.
“What if this hacker knew that we were cats, and uploaded the picture to mock us?” I offered solemnly. My words sank in and everyone was silent once again.
This time, I didn’t break the silence. Calibri lashed his tail, “That’s ridiculous!” he roared. However, we all knew it was entirely possible.
“W-what would happen to us if the p-public realized we were cats, Cal Cal.” Mom asked worriedly, tears coating her eyes.
Some sort of fire lit inside Calibri, for he stood up straight and stroked Helvetica’s back with his tail. “Don’t worry Helly, my love! I’ll protect you.” he promised.
Now somewhat soothed, Helvetic suggested, “We need to discuss this in private.”
“No worries my love!” Calibri shouted and pointed his tail towards The Dip. The Dip is a small hole in the wall that I discovered a little after I was born, just big enough for even Calibri to fit through. It leads to a small alcove in the walls. Tori and Jay failed to notice it, making it a perfect spot for a secret family meeting place. Although we are entirely alone, a secret meeting spot makes everything feel so much more authentic.
Once we had all gathered in the dark hole in the wall, I started the meeting. “As founder of The Dip Meeting Hall, I officially call this meeting to order.” I said hitting the floor with the gabble I held in my mouth. Helvetica leaned forward, a look of excitement and importance shining on her face, while Calibri rolled his eyes.
After no one spoke, I began. “I’ll start. According to my research, this so called hacker lives in France and could possibly know our secret identity as overworked cats. Calibri what do you think?”
“I think- Oh Binary quit it with the act-” Calibri complained.
“Captain Binary.” I corrected mischievously.
Calibri rolled his eyes. “Anyways, I think if the public knows that we’re cats, our entire lifestyle is done for.” My dad stated, “We could get taken away and never see Jay or Tori again.”
“Thanks for your cheerful input, Calibri.” Dad aimed a sheathed paw at my head, which I expertly dodged, much to his annoyance.
“Oo! Oo! Can I say something Captain Binary?” Helvetica asked.
“Of course, Helvetica.” I replied.
“Well you see, I was watching TV the other day and I saw these people- well technically they weren’t people, I have no clue what they were… uh… let’s just call them tiny people, alright. So these tiny people were tinier than everyone else so they got on top of each other and put a big trench coat over them to conceal the bodies and they looked human!” she explained, at this point gasping for air.
“Your point?” Calibri grumbled as Helvetica caught her breath.
“My point is we should do that to convince the hacker that we’re human!” Helvetica exclaimed cheerfully.
“That’s the dumbest thing-”
“Haha! Let’s do it!” I yelled, jumping in the air.
***
Dad groaned in annoyance while Mom bounced up and down in her seat, barely containing her excitement. We were soaring 2,000 feet above the ground, on our way to France.
“American Airlanes, infiltrated. All necessary supplies have been acquired. We will be landing soon. Captain Binary, signing out.” I posted to Nekospace. Seconds later, two shrill mews sounded on Calibri’s and Helvetica’s phones. Mom hastily reached for her phone to see my post, while Calibri ignored it.
The three of us each sat in our own seats on the flight as we prepared for our mission. I found the exact location of the hacker, and rehearsed exactly what I would say and do. We were going to use Helvetica’s idea, me being at the top, since I could speak fluent French. While in our disguise, we would convince the hacker that we are the lead programmer of the game, and he’d let us in his house. From there, we would delete any sensitive information about us, whilst proving to everyone that we are a human, not three overworked cats. Besides, I knew we could do this. After all, we are way more intelligent than the average house cat.
“Helly, do we have to do this?” Calibri groaned.
“You agreed Cal Cal. You can’t back out now.” Helvetica responded. Even though Calibri hated the idea, he came with us to make sure we were safe.
“Attention troops!” Binary called. Helvetica whipped around excitedly and Calibri grunted. “Let Mission ‘Teach you Guys French’ commence!”
“Sacré bleu.” Calibri muttered. However, I heard his snarky remark and obviously jumped at the chance to correct him.
“WRONG!” I yelled, “No one says that anymore. Stick with the times m’kay?” My dad, evidently annoyed, decided to keep his mouth shut. After many long, busy years of coding and programming I became multilingual, speaking eighteen very different languages, including French. Therefore, I would be the teacher, and Calibri would have to suck it up. During our grueling hours discussing a plan in The Dip, we decided it would be a good idea if Calibri and Helvetica could speak a little French, in case of emergency. I lectured them on simple phrases and landmarks until the plane landed.
***
We were standing in the big city of Paris, busy people whizzing past us, hardly noticing three cats holding a trench coat in their mouths. The sun lowered below the Eifel Tower, the amount of people lessening. We decided to make our move, and ducked into an alleyway to assemble our disguise.
“Calibri, you being the man of the house will be at the bottom, supporting our weight. Helvetica, you will be on top of him. Both of you cannot talk or make it apparent you are cats. I will be on top, since I am the most fluent in the native language and I mostly made the plan. Any objections?” I commanded
Calibri, once again, rolled his eyes, while Helvetica saluted me with her tail. Not the most ideal team, but a passible one.
“Calibri, stand right there.” I ordered. Surprisingly, he trudged over with no complaints and straightened out his back so Helvetica could climb on top.
Turning to my mother, I yelled, “Sergeant Helvetica!”
“Sir yes sir!”
I, who was having way too much fun with this, pointed to Calibri. “Jump on top of his back.” I told her. Taking my words quite too literally, she took a running start and leaped onto Calibri’s back, causing the two to fall over. I cackled and howled as my dad struggled to his paws, hissing and spitting in annoyance.
“Let’s try that again.” I chortled, much to Calibri’s annoyance. Calibri reverted to his original position, and Helvetica, more carefully this time, climbed onto his back. They wobbled a few times then steadied.
“Success! My turn!” I hooted. Grabbing the trench coat in my mouth, I scrambled over my parents and onto Helvetica’s back. I waited for balance, then somehow slipped the trench coat over us.
“Ready troops, over to that overly convenient mirror!” I directed. We wobbled over to the mirror, almost falling over twice. I looked into the mirror and saw a three foot tall figure in a trench coat with a cat’s head.
“No one’s going to fall for this!” Calibri, who was looking through a gap between the buttons, said.
“No worries. White lies are my specialty, just trust me. What could go wrong?” I replied.
***
Slowly and totally unhumanlike, we made our way to the hacker’s doorstep. Whoever he was, owned a small cubular white house with no windows, only a mechanical door with a strange contraption on top of it. If push came to shove, I could probably hack into the door to enter.
“Ring the doorbell!” Calibri insisted. My parents wriggled underneath the coat, almost causing us to collapse. Hardly containing a giggle, I examined the door, in search of a doorbell. But there wasn’t one I could see.
“Negative.” I replied.
“Negative?” Helvetica repeated.
“What do you mean negative? Do you not see a doorbell?” Calibri said, exasperated. Suddenly, a screen lowered down from the contraption above the door, causing Calibri to jump. As we fought for stability, a face appeared on the screen. However it was not a real face, just an illustration.
“Welcome visitors, please sing the Star Spangled Banner in French to proceed.” the screen requested.
“Is tha-” Helvetica began but was silenced by a flick of Calibri’s tail. My parents were dumbfounded, probably because they did not speak fluent French. Luckily, their commander did.
“Oh dis, peux-to voir.” I sang. From the speaker above the screen, I heard the hacker gasp. I guess it’s not everyday something like this happened.
The door slowly opened revealing a tall male figure in his twenties standing before us. He looked somewhat like a hipster, with black glasses and a checkered flannel, a part of his hair dyed bright gray.
“Hello there sir.” I greeted in French, “We- er I mean I am the lead programmer of the company ___.”
The hacker stared at them, wearing a skeptical look. Finally, he sighed and said, “Come on in, my name is 404. I’m also a computer programmer.” We wobbled into the room, shaking dangerously as we went. The security around his house and hipsterish apparel separated him from the rest of society. No worries though, for a cat stuck on a computer all day I was pretty great at these situations. The hacker gestured for us to sit, but I kindly refused. God knows what we would do if we somehow had to sit.
“So…” 404 started, “What brings you here?” I decided it would be a bad idea to accuse the hacker, so I instead told a little lie.
“Meh, we were in France so I thought I’d stop by.” I quickly lied. The hacker nodded slowly.
“We? Why would you stop by here?” 404 insisted. Dang, he’s not falling for it.
“Y’know, me and my crew. Word is on the street you’re a pretty cool programmer.” I explained. 404 squinted his eyes, probably not believing a word I said. Calibri shuffled and we all swayed to the side.
“Also, excuse my asking, but” he said slowly, “why are you so short? And why do you look like a cat?” Luckily, I had rehearsed these very lines over and over on the plane. I knew the answer to this question.
“I’ll tell ya the truth, 404.” I replied, “I was dropped on the head as a child. It stunted my growth, and made me extremely wobbly when I walk. And the cat makeup is just a weird quirk of mine. Y’know, you do you.”
But the hacker wasn’t buying it. He ripped the trench coat off of us and snapped a picture.
***
“What a drag.” I sighed. We were back at our apartment, discussing our failure in The Dip. Helvetica’s tail sagged and Calibri was more irritated than ever. We failed our mission, and probably made our situation a whole lot worse. The consequences we might face were unthinkable.
“W-what’s going to happen to us?” Helvetica asked, her voice cracking with emotion. Calibri’s eyes softened and he began licking my mom’s fur.
“We’ll be alright Helly.” He reassured. But what would happen to us? The public would be enraged that Jay and Tori had “forced” us to work so hard, each and every day. But we loved our life, being able to code and work for the company. But society won’t understand that. We’re just cats after all. At this point, not even I can lift the spirits in the room.
The door creaked, and Jay and Tori entered. They called for us, and we slowly filed out of our secret meeting place. We stood in front of them, wondering how they would react.
Laughter. Our owners were giggling, and bent down to pet us. What were they doing? Surely they’d be upset. My parents had the same sense of surprise, but each of us slowly gave in to the happiness Jay and Tori radiated. It was a big relief they weren’t upset.
Jay stood up and walked over to my desk, motioning for us to follow. Tori picked Helvetica up, stroking her head, bringing her over to the desk. I looked at my dad, who smiled for once, and stalked over. I followed and leaped onto the desk.
When I got there, Jay was already logged onto Facebook. What is he doing on Facebook? He scrolled through his feed down to the picture of us stacked on top of eachother. Above it was an explanation of our secret. That the entire company was run by us. I froze. It was too late now to do anything about it.
But Jay and Tori giggled and opened up the comments. Scrolling through it, the replies were all positive. “OMG!!! Lolol how awesome. The cats obviously enjoy it so lets just go wtih it tbh i wanna byu there products even more.” One read. The majority of them were like this, positive and reassuring.
Nothing and everything would change. They could still do their jobs, but everyone would know they were cats. They would not improve, but their sales would soar. We all stared in amazement at the screen when an idea crossed my mind.
I open a new tab and logged onto NekoSpace. Being the founder of the site, I could see how many users there were on the website. The three users had changed to a whopping half million users. My dream of owning a successful social media website had came true.
Clicking home again, I began typing.
“Lol how awkward. Coming out: we’re cats. Thank you all for your support! We’ll be sure to work even harder from now on. Peace out! -Binary.” I posted.
A shrill meow sounded, letting me know I received a friend request. I accepted it, and became friends with a hacker. Binary, out.